To Fear or Not to Fear

Hello everyone, 

Today I want to talk about fear.  Now we could discuss all kinds of phobias and it seems like there is a phobia for almost everything.  There is even phobia of success.  Can you believe it!  If you Google it, there are a lot of things to say about it.  There's also the fear of failure which is the opposite.  We run around a lot wondering about what happens if we fail.  What happens if we try out for something and don't make it?  Most of the time, nothing really bad happens.  We might get embarrassed if we fail or we might not get something we had our heart set to do.  But other than that, what negative really happens?

Let me ask you this.  What would you do if you knew you couldn't fail?  Would you become a professional athlete?  Maybe you would run for President or run some big corporation.  I am digressing from my topic for tonight so I will save this discussion for another day.

Let's talk about fear itself.  It can grip us and stop us in our tracks.  Some people believe that a little fear is healthy for you.  That's almost as intelligent as saying a little cancer is healthy for you or a few broken bones are good for you.  After all, they might teach you something right?  Nope.  A little fear is not good for you because fear connects you to the devil and that's not a connection you need to make. 

Now I can hear some of you saying, "Well Mr. Minion, the Bible says the fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom."  Yes, there are some translations of the Bible that use those words but what it really means that the reverence of the Lord and the respect for the Lord is the beginning of wisdom.  It doesn't mean that being terrified of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom.  For the record, God doesn't want you to be afraid of Him.  That thought is just plain ridiculous.  Are any of you parents?  Are any of you in a relationship?  Do you want your children, spouse or boyfriend/girlfriend to be afraid of you?  Of course not,  I have five children and I don't want any of them to be afraid of me, not even a little bit.

If you think about it for a few minutes, we use the word fear a lot and can make connections to it.  Have you ever said, "That scared me to death?"  how about sayings like, "That ____ will be the death of me yet?"  Some people even sit around and talk about all the bad things that can happen to them.

So is fear a good thing?  Not on any level.  So if fear is so bad for you, what's the opposite of fear?  The answer is faith.  Faith in what?  First and foremost, faith in God.  Second faith in yourself.  Third faith in the plan God has for your life.  When you turn from fear, you're left with faith.  

I can already hear some of you saying, "Well what about what's going on right now in my life?  What if it doesn't work out?"  Not too long ago, I was afraid of losing my job and I was afraid that my new wife wouldn't care for me anymore.  That she might even not want to be with me anymore.  That fear was gripping.  But here's what I finally realized.  Regardless of what she did or didn't do, God would be with me.  He will see me through to the place of victory he has for me.  For those of you who know me personally, you should know that my wife has very strong moral character and I truly believe that she is deeply in love with me and committed to me.  The only thing that freed me from it's grip was to turn to faith in God.  If all those bad things happened, I would still be OK.  

But one thing I learned while sitting in that fear was that I didn't enjoy life.  I was sitting at a place watching everyone around me having a good time and I wasn't.  Why?  Because that fear had a grip on me.  Once I got out of that grip through faith, I started having a good time again.  So if your at this place right now, let me encourage you.  Take a step out of fear and take a step of faith!

That's another Opinion of the Minion

Fight or Flight

Hello everyone,

This post might not apply to everyone but today I want to talk about your fight or flight reflex.  This is really something I probably already knew but it's something that I have realized about myself recently.  I don't know where I heard this but I have heard it several times lately.  When we face fear or some unpleasant situation, there is a reflex that kicks in almost immediately.  We either want to fight the situation or we want to run away from the situation.  

Before I tell you what I learned, let me say that to go to either extreme is not a wise decision.  There are times when you should fight and there are times when you should simply walk away.  In the words of my mom's favorite Kenny Rogers song, "You've got to know when to hold'em.  Know when to fold 'em.  Know when to walk away and know when to run."  I will soon describe what I have learned about my flight mechanism but before I do, let me say that there are going to be times when you should run away from the problem.  If you find yourself confronted with a gun and you don't have one, RUN. If you find yourself in an abusive relationship, ladies RUN.

But what if you just find yourself in a hard place?  For me, I used to shy away from conflict.  It has taken me several years to realize that this was me running from problems.  I didn't want to hurt any one's feelings and I didn't like when people hurt mine so I would just avoid the conflict.  In some ways, I reasoned that it was easier to just keep walking.  Now if someone calls you a name, that is the best thing to do.  If you don't like the way they treat you, then just keep walking.

But what if the person you don't like is your husband or wife?  Or what if that person is someone who works for you?  Maybe that person is your boss.  You can't just run away from everyone of those types of issues.  Just recently in my own life, I was faced with a situation where my wife did something that I didn't like.  The easiest thing for me to do would have been just let it go and say nothing.  Now we both do that for each other regularly and that's part of a healthy relationship.  But in this case, it was something that really bothered me.  I could sense myself getting mad at her and I noticed that because I hadn't talked with her about this one thing, almost any little thing she did would aggravate me much more than it should.  That's when it finally hit me that I was trying to run from a situation that I needed to address.  Now here's the amazing part of this story to me.  As soon as I recognized what was going on inside me, the little things that were trying to annoy me disappeared!  I was perfectly fine waiting to talk with her about it until we had time.  Here's another thing, as it turned out, it was just a misunderstanding between us.  This particular issue wasn't a big one at all but it did teach me that I need to identify places where I am trying to fly when there are times that I need to fight.

So that's another Opinion of the Minion