Hello All,
Today I want to talk to you about trust. For some of us, trusting people can be a very hard thing to do. If we have been hurt by something or someone, trusting becomes that much more difficult. Today's blog will not be about trusting someone else. Today I want to write about something that has been very hard for me until just recently. We all know how hard it is to learn to trust other people but for me it was even harder to trust a very important person - myself.
For many of you this may not be an issue and if you know me, you might be surprised that this was an issue for me but in certain areas of my life. I had to learn to trust myself. Have you ever heard the saying, if it walks like a duck and quacks like a duck, it's probably a duck? Well for me, if it walked and quacked like a duck, I still might have thought it was a pelican. Why? Good question. I don't really know the answer. But I will tell you that not trusting myself was causing me some problems. See when we don't trust ourselves, we are always unsure of what to do.
Don't get me wrong, even if you totally trust yourself, there will be times when you don't know what to do. In those cases, the best thing to do is to get quite until you have peace about doing something. If you are a Christian, peace is one of God's ways of letting you know what he wants you to do.
Now specifically for me, I had to learn to trust my own instincts when it came to dating. Because I haven't been in the dating world in a long time, I went to some friends of mine and asked their thoughts on dating and how to do it. I specifically asked about online dating. A friend, CS, told me that I should try it after I got divorced because he had friends that done it and had success. I was very skeptical to say the least. So after talking to another friend of mine about online dating, I set up a week where I was supposed to have several dates with different women during the same week. After all, that was the way to work this online dating thing.
I was also got some good advice about how to work things if you found someone you liked. In order to not appear desperate, I was told to wait to contact a person until the next day and always wait a couple of days before you tried to schedule another date. You really didn't want to appear desperate as that frightened girls away. So I took all this good advice and was prepared to follow it. Why? Because the advice came from people with more experience than me and that made sense. However, I learned an extremely important lesson during that week. First of all, I didn't go on all four dates. I didn't need to.
On the second one, I found someone I really special. She truly is an amazing woman and I am very blessed to have her in my life. On our first date, we went to lunch and talked for three hours. I think we have talked to each other every day since. Anyway, after lunch as we were walking out to our cars, I had a decision to make. I could do what I was told or I could trust my instincts. The advice I was given was good advice but I decided that I just needed to be myself and do my thing my way. So I asked this person if I could see her on Sunday of that week and she said yes. It was simple as that.
After that, I cancelled the other two dates because I wanted to get to know this person better. When I did it, one of my friends made fun of me a little for doing it. He is a great friend and he had my best interest at heart but I had learned to trust me by that point and knew I did the right thing. See I realized that I was never going to be the guy who could date multiple women at the same time. I just don't have the time or the energy to do it. I also realized that I had found a truly unique person who was definitely worth getting to know more. To use a football analogy that a friend of mine told me, I had out kicked my coverage.
The interesting thing is that after my friends met this particular woman, I think they are more interested in inviting her to things than they are inviting me! I could go on for a long time about her and maybe I will in a different blog.
I don't know if any of this would have happened if I hadn't learned to trust my own instincts. I just did what I had peace to do and the rest took care of itself.
So what am I saying. Trust yourself. You will be glad you did.
That's the Opinion of the Minion
Today I want to talk to you about trust. For some of us, trusting people can be a very hard thing to do. If we have been hurt by something or someone, trusting becomes that much more difficult. Today's blog will not be about trusting someone else. Today I want to write about something that has been very hard for me until just recently. We all know how hard it is to learn to trust other people but for me it was even harder to trust a very important person - myself.
For many of you this may not be an issue and if you know me, you might be surprised that this was an issue for me but in certain areas of my life. I had to learn to trust myself. Have you ever heard the saying, if it walks like a duck and quacks like a duck, it's probably a duck? Well for me, if it walked and quacked like a duck, I still might have thought it was a pelican. Why? Good question. I don't really know the answer. But I will tell you that not trusting myself was causing me some problems. See when we don't trust ourselves, we are always unsure of what to do.
Don't get me wrong, even if you totally trust yourself, there will be times when you don't know what to do. In those cases, the best thing to do is to get quite until you have peace about doing something. If you are a Christian, peace is one of God's ways of letting you know what he wants you to do.
Now specifically for me, I had to learn to trust my own instincts when it came to dating. Because I haven't been in the dating world in a long time, I went to some friends of mine and asked their thoughts on dating and how to do it. I specifically asked about online dating. A friend, CS, told me that I should try it after I got divorced because he had friends that done it and had success. I was very skeptical to say the least. So after talking to another friend of mine about online dating, I set up a week where I was supposed to have several dates with different women during the same week. After all, that was the way to work this online dating thing.
I was also got some good advice about how to work things if you found someone you liked. In order to not appear desperate, I was told to wait to contact a person until the next day and always wait a couple of days before you tried to schedule another date. You really didn't want to appear desperate as that frightened girls away. So I took all this good advice and was prepared to follow it. Why? Because the advice came from people with more experience than me and that made sense. However, I learned an extremely important lesson during that week. First of all, I didn't go on all four dates. I didn't need to.
On the second one, I found someone I really special. She truly is an amazing woman and I am very blessed to have her in my life. On our first date, we went to lunch and talked for three hours. I think we have talked to each other every day since. Anyway, after lunch as we were walking out to our cars, I had a decision to make. I could do what I was told or I could trust my instincts. The advice I was given was good advice but I decided that I just needed to be myself and do my thing my way. So I asked this person if I could see her on Sunday of that week and she said yes. It was simple as that.
After that, I cancelled the other two dates because I wanted to get to know this person better. When I did it, one of my friends made fun of me a little for doing it. He is a great friend and he had my best interest at heart but I had learned to trust me by that point and knew I did the right thing. See I realized that I was never going to be the guy who could date multiple women at the same time. I just don't have the time or the energy to do it. I also realized that I had found a truly unique person who was definitely worth getting to know more. To use a football analogy that a friend of mine told me, I had out kicked my coverage.
The interesting thing is that after my friends met this particular woman, I think they are more interested in inviting her to things than they are inviting me! I could go on for a long time about her and maybe I will in a different blog.
I don't know if any of this would have happened if I hadn't learned to trust my own instincts. I just did what I had peace to do and the rest took care of itself.
So what am I saying. Trust yourself. You will be glad you did.
That's the Opinion of the Minion
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