Christmas Part 1

OK.  We are now officially in my favorite time of the year in Texas.  It's Christmas time.  It's not X-Mas, etc.  It's Christmas.  What do I like so much about Christmas?  Is it the tree, the lights, all the parties and food?  Is it Santa Claus or decorating the house?  Nope.  My favorite part of this year is carrying on the first Christmas tradition.

See, because God loved the world so much, he sent his son, Jesus to earth so we could reconnect with him.  Jesus came because he wanted to give this gift to God, his Father.  What's the common thread?  God gave Jesus so that the world would be blessed.  Jesus gave himself so that God would be blessed.  That's what this season is all about.  It's about giving, not getting.  I am not sure where but I heard somewhere that it is more blessed to give than receive.  At least in my life, that's really true.

Now we have a lot of traditions and I am thankful for them.  I used to enjoy decorating the Christmas tree.  That stopped when I was a young child though.  Apparently we were making a popcorn string to go around the Christmas tree when some part of the light fixture fell from the ceiling and hit me in the head.  Now my parents were renting that place and I don't know if we had to pay for the fixture after it broke from hitting my hard head or not.  OK - I still enjoy decorating the tree and the story above is true or so my parents tell me.

I love to go looking at the Christmas lights.  One of my favorite memories was going with my cousins in the back of my Uncle's suburban when we were kids.  We went to a place called Interlocken (sp?) in Arlington.  What fun we had that trip.  I can also remember the parties and the family fun.  My Aunt Pat used to have a platter that was shaped like a Christmas tree.  She would fill it with this fancy candy and I loved to get into that platter.  That was something I looked forward to every year.  But the older I get, the more I focus on the only real tradition that matters - giving.

As a matter of fact, I like to think about who I can bless and how.  There have been many times when I did something nice for someone and I could hear God inside me (my Dad) saying how proud he was of me.  Now don't get me wrong, I don't think there is anything wrong with wanting stuff and getting stuff for Christmas.  After all, someone will get blessed by what we do and it's OK to let someone bless you - even though I get really uncomfortable when people bless me.  I must admit, I would really prefer to be the blessor than the blessee.  For me, I am much more concerned with whether people will like what I got them than if I will like what they got me.

So I want to encourage you as you go through this season.  It's good to make your Christmas list and while you look for things for parents, family, friends and that special someone, look around for someone outside your ordinary box to bless. Remember that's the first true tradition of Christmas.

That's another Opinion of the Minion

My Dad

Today I am thankful for my dad.  There is certainly the obvious reason that I without him I would not exist.  So I am thankful for that but I am also very thankful for the job he did raising me.  Now my dad wasn't perfect and I am sure if you asked him, he would tell you that there are things he wishes he would have done differently.  Guess what, we are all like that.

But dad did teach me some things that are really important.  They are things that helped me develop my character.

First of all, don't lie.  I don't remember getting very many spankings from him but if you lied, that was a good way to get one.  I got one for a lie/stealing combo sin once.  That wasn't a fun one.  I had been stealing money out of his wallet and out of mom's purse to go down to the police station and buy candy.  I don't remember why I actually confessed.  I think dad caught me and after I lied for a while, I finally came clean.  I definitely was put on the straight and narrow for that incident.

Second, don't steal.  See paragraph above.

Third, and very important, laugh often.  My dad is a comedian.  When he was in the Navy, he even got paid to do some comedy shows.  This is evident in the way he does things even to this day.  My dad can tell a story that will have everyone around him in stitches laughing.  Now sometimes his stories aren't entirely true.  He was an ambulance driver when I was a very young boy and he still loves to tell the stories from his time driving.  Now all of these stories are definitely rooted in fact but there are normally minor embellishments around the fringe to make them even funnier.  But the bible says, A merry heart doeth good like a medicine.  When someone is in the hospital, he is the guy you want there with them because he is so good at cheering people up.  Now this may seem minor to you but it has always been big to me because I don't think I am near as good at it as him.

Dad is definitely the guy you want around in a crisis situation.  As I mentioned above, he is great at making people laugh and feel better about themselves.  But I will also tell you that he was great at handling other types of crisis.  God forbid you messed with one of Big John's family or friends in his younger days.  That would be the start of a very bad day for you.  I saw this side of him once when a neighbor tried to run me off the road.  That guy has no idea how lucky he is to still be walking this earth today.

My dad also taught me about work ethic.  I saw him work crazy amounts of hours when we were growing up.  My dad taught me that you should always work hard and try your best.  He was a security guard most of my life but he didn't act like most of the security personnel I had ever met.  He acted like a professional.  He did his job to the best of his ability.  He went to work rain, sleet, snow or hail and whether he was sick or not.  It didn't matter, he went and he always did a good job.  He did this right up until the time he retired.  I try to follow his example to this day.

Dad, at our cousin's funeral, I spoke and apparently said some pretty nice things.  After that, I think you were joking but you asked me to speak at your funeral when the time came because you wanted me to say nice things about you too.  Well, I wanted to take this opportunity to tell you them while you were still alive.

There are other things I could mention but I want to leave you with one final thing my dad has taught me.  You are never too old to change.  See, my mom took us to church all our lives.  I don't remember going with my dad more than a handful of times ever.  My mom and I have always been fairly faithful church going people.

It has only been in the last several years that dad started going to church.  Because he started when he did, he showed me that you are never too late to change.  Now a lot of people know me at my church for various reasons but my dad has turned out to be the most faithful church attender of our entire family.

Dad, thanks for all the life lessons: for chevrolets and fords, for eating mashed potatoes with your hands, for the wizard, for MASH and spaghetti, for going bowling with dip in your pocket, for playing spades with us growing up, for showing me how to cheer people up when they are in a tough place, for teaching me to do the right thing and for all the other things.

That's another Opinion of the Minion

Letter to Matthew

This is the last in the letter series to my children and this one goes out to Matthew.

Dear Matt,

You are the most amazing young boy.  There are things that are different about you from a lot of boys.  One thing I notice is that you hate to play games that match one person against another.  This is something that I certainly understand.  When I was growing up, I never liked to play a video game where it was me against another person.  Do you know why?  Because that meant there had to be a winner and a loser and I hated the idea.  I would much rather play a game that would put me on a team and our team would play against the computer.  Why is that?  Because I wanted everyone to win and I was always searching for a way to make that happen.  In life, I still do that to this day.  Do you know why we do that?  Because we are made like our Dad in Heaven.  The only person he intends to lose is the devil.  He created a system that allows everyone to be happy and have the things they need and want in life.

So don't be frustrated by this son.  The reason you are like that is because God made you that way.  Matthew, God has a purpose for your life and I think it is much like the purpose he has for mine.  There is a special anointing from God on your life.  Now I know at age 7, you probably don't understand much of this but I want you to remember this because there will come a time in life when it will be very important to you.  See Matthew, you are a person who likes to build relationships and not tear them down.  You operate in that area just like God does.  Pretty cool huh.

I also notice what a big heart you have.  You don't like to see people hurting.  This is another characteristic of the calling that the Lord has on your life.  Did you know when you were little that I used to play a game with you.  You would do something funny and I would pretend that it hurt my feelings.  I wasn't upset; I was happy but I would pretend to cry by covering up my eyes with my hands and making crying noises.  As soon as that happened, no matter how mad you were, you would come over and put your arms around me and hug me.  You didn't like to see people hurting.  Matthew this characteristic of you is something that is embedded deep within you and it will play a part in what the Lord has for you later.

There is another thing that I consider special about you.  You are one of the best story tellers that I know.  I am constantly amazed at your ability to retain a story after only hearing it once or twice.  After that, you can tell me the whole story, word for word.  It's pretty amazing.  There are times when I get tired of hearing about Thomas the Tank Engine, Jakers, Kipper and Spongebob but know this that your storytelling ability will be another big part of you when you grow up.  Some people might get tired of hearing it (like Katherine and David) but one day, they will be really impressed with it.

Also, you have the most beautiful voice for a kid your age.  I really love to hear you sing.  As a matter of fact, I want you to sing more.  Son, don't be embarrassed by this.  You and I are a lot alike in that we don't want to draw attention to ourselves and that is a good thing.  But you have a gift.  That gift was put inside you by God to bless you, Him and others.  Please understand that when I ask you to sing it is because your voice is so good, it blesses everyone who listens.  I want you to continue to develop this very special gift.

Lastly Matthew, I want you to know how much I love you.  Son, you are that kid that everyone likes and it's easy to see why.  You are caring, you do your work when asked, you very rarely get into trouble, and you always have a smile on your face.  But I don't love you for any of those reasons.  I love you simply because you are who you are.  You are my son.

Love,

Dad

That's another Opinion of the Minion

My Mom vs. Goliath

Today I want to tell you how thankful I am for the drug problem I had as a child.  No, it wasn't the kind of drugs you are thinking about.  My mom drug me to church every week.

The church building isn't there anymore.  It was knocked down by a tornado that hit downtown Fort Worth several years ago and I really miss that church building.  Now don't get me wrong, Jesus isn't in a building and the church is so much more that a building.  The church is the people who go to and from the building every week.  See when people see us they should see Christ in us not in a building.  But that building was a very special one to me.

I have said this publicly but I will say it again, Thank you mom for dragging me kicking, screaming and sometimes cussing to church with you every week.  If it wasn't for that, I would hate to think about where I would be today.

So let me tell you a little more about this drug problem.  When I was around 5 years old, we started attending Calvary Cathedral in downtown Fort Worth.  The church started out as a Baptist church that Pastor Bob Nichols bought.  At the age of 5, church was fine but as I got a little older it really cramped my style.  Because of where we lived and just our normal schedule, I did not make many friends at the church when I was young.  (I think I would have made several good friends if I was more friendly myself but that's beside the point.)

The other problem was something I considered much more critical.  Now you have to understand that this was before the days of VCRs and DVRs so I couldn't record anything from TV.  Why is this important you ask?  Because the Dallas Cowboys played at noon and I was a big fan back then.  I hated that I had to go to church and miss part of the game.  By the time we got out of church, the 1st Quarter was always over and I didn't like that.  As I got to high school, I would stay out late and be tired and thus again I didn't want to go to church.  I cussed my mother out more than once (No, not to her face.  I wasn't that stupid) for dragging me to that church.  I even decided that I wouldn't stay in the services while I was there.  Now the church building was pretty big and it had two stories so I decided to hide in the rooms upstairs until the service was over.  This worked out pretty well for several months until the mom of one of my few friends followed me up to my "secret" room.

Needless to say, my mom found out and I got drug out of the room and back down to the service.  I can tell you she was a very unhappy camper when she found us that day.  Now my mom is a little lady but she sure looked like a giant that day.  If David had seen her instead of Goliath he might have reconsidered.  If Goliath had seen her he would have ran instead of running his mouth.  So back down to the service we went.  After a certain amount of time, I finally decided I would outsmart her again.  I didn't want to be there and while she could drag me there as long as I lived under her roof, she couldn't make me listen to a word Pastor Bob was saying.  If anyone from Calvary reads this, let me say how thankful I am for a true man of God like Bob Nichols.  I have nothing but the highest respect and admiration for him. 

So if you were looking out from the pulpit, I was sitting in the very back row on the far right hand side of the sanctuary.  Now our sanctuary was round so the isle we sat on had only three seats.  If you took one of them you did so at your own peril because my brother and I owned them.  There was a strategic reason that I picked these seats.  You could not see my facial expression from the pulpit, there was no one directly behind me, you would have to turn around to look at me if you were in front of me and lastly, if I put my bible on the arm rest of the chair, put my elbow on the bible, and leaned my face on my hand, my head would stay upright and you couldn't see my eyes if you sat to my right.

Why was this important?  Because it allowed me to sleep through every service without getting caught.  Or at least no one woke me up if they knew I was asleep (I am sure that people knew because I snored like a chain saw at a logger's championship).  So I slept back there and my mom kept dragging us to church.  But there was something that really bothered me.  At the end of every service, Pastor Bob would start his closing prayer by saying, "Father, we've heard the word of God today...."  Only I hadn't heard the word so I wouldn't pray that part of the prayer because it would be a lie.  So one day, I decided to stay awake and listen to what he said.  This went on for several more years and Pastor Bob taught me a lot.  Thanks to a mother who wouldn't stop bringing her son to church.

But here's the interesting part.  There were many things that I wanted to do with my time back then.  Church wasn't in the top 100.  I wanted to play outside, hang out with my friends, watch football, etc.  But when the major crises came in my life, when I needed help with my weight, when I was going through my divorce, at every point where I struggled, I never once cried out to the Dallas Cowboys, to my friends or to any other thing that would have taken my time.  I cried out to the One that I learned about all those times mother drug me to church.  I cried out to God.  Never once quoted a Cowboy rushing stat when I needed financial help.  I qouted the word of God and God saw me through my difficulty.  I never once found comfort in any church substitute.  I found comfort by going back to the place where my mother drug me week in and week out all those years.

That's another Opinion of the Minion

The Greatest Men I Ever Knew

Hi Everyone,

Today I want to talk to you about someone who was very special to me.  He was one of the greatest men I ever knew.  His name was Thelbert Sanford Rawle and he was/is my grandfather.  I say was/is because he was my grandfather while he was here on earth and he is still my grandfather.  He is in both my future and my past but not my present.  Confusing?  Well that's a different opinion altogether.  Let me tell you a few things about my grandfather.  He left us a few years ago and while he was here, I really didn't understand how great he was.

Well let's start with what he was not.  He never owned a large company, never wrote a best selling novel, never went to law school and never had a lot of money.  See, when most of us consider what success looks like - fame, power, money, etc., Sanford Rawle would not have been considered all that great.  Notice I didn't call him Thelbert.  No one did that I know of.  He didn't like his first name.  So why is he the greatest man I have ever knew?

Well, its funny that the older I get the more I realize why.  While Granddad didn't do things that would put his name in the paper, he did something that most people don't do enough.  He impacted other people's lives.

This Labor Day, we had a gathering at my cousin AB's house.  They were so gracious to have us and I really enjoyed it.  But while we were sitting around telling stories and laughing and getting extremely loud (that's what Rawle's do), I could see him there.  He would have been telling stores and laughing harder than the rest of us.  If you looked closely into his eyes, there was always a sparkle but more importantly, there was always love.  He was the image of what I think love should look like.  He wasn't flashy, he wasn't always trying to get attention, he just went about living life and loving his family.  He was married to one woman, my grandmother, Margie, for 68 years.  I can't even imagine that.

When I look at what he was able to accomplish, I am astounded.  See I have a lot of formal education, he had a lot of informal smarts.  He didn't have people to teach him how to do stuff, so he taught himself.  If something needed to be fixed, they didn't have the money to get it repaired so he figured out how to fix it himself.  I never in all my life saw him ask for a handout but he always had hand out to help someone else.

I remember one time my house needed a new front door.  Granddad heard about it and came over to help me put one on.  Now I didn't just need a new front door, I needed a new door frame and the whole works. Granddad was in his seventies at the time and he just showed up for work one Saturday ready to help his grandson.  Well, we got the door jam and all out and it was laying in the front yard.  Since I had never seen him fail at fixing something, I just knew he would be able to help me fix this.  So I asked him, how many of these he had done before.  After all, he had 70+ years experience at fixing things.  This shouldn't be any big deal.  I was shocked to hear him say that this was his first time.  True to Sanford Rawle form, we got the door put in right.

Here are some things I learned from him.
1.  Laugh often and laugh a lot - It didn't take much to get him started and once you did, he would laugh for ever.  If you look at pictures, he almost always had a smile on his face.  I learned something about that smile.  It was contagious.  You didn't get around him for very long before you were smiling too.  As a matter of fact, if you were around him for a very long time, your jaws would hurt from laughing so hard.

2.  Love isn't a language or words, its a life.  Granddad loved his family and almost everyone he came in contact with.  He didn't just say I love you, he lived I love you.  He was the type of man who was there for you when you needed him.  We all know people who say, call if you need anything and then always have an excuse why they can't help.  He wasn't that man.

3.  Your family is important.  This is something that most of my generation has lost.  His brothers, sisters, and wife were his best friends.  They went on vacation together, the spent holidays together, they played games together.  Not only that but he loved his kids and grand kids.  He was always patient with us.  I only hope and pray that one day I can be more like him, especially in the area of patience.  He was always giving to his family.  While he didn't spend large amounts of money on us that I remember, he gave me things that are far more valuable.  He gave me a joker (this is a card and marble game) board that he made by hand.  He gave all of his children wagon replicas of the one he used as a kid to all of his children.  Mom, Unc and Unc, how much money would it take to buy that wagon from you? They may not read this so but I feel pretty confident I can answer - The wagon isn't for sale at any price.  I still have a tool box that we built together when I was probably six or seven.



3.  Granddad taught me a lot about gossip.  He didn't ever that I remember.  Enough said.

4.  Mind your own business.  My granddad never got into my personal business unless I asked him.  Because of this, when I did ask, I was much more apt to listen to what he said.

5.  Don't eat your own.  Too many times in a family we have a tendency to talk badly about each other.  We think we know what everyone else should do and how they should do it and we aren't afraid to tell them exactly what we think regardless of whether or not it helps or hurts.  My grandfather wasn't like that.

6.  THIS ONE IS HUGE - Have a tender heart.  I often saw my grandfather's heart touched.  He hurt when his loved ones hurt and he was happy for them when they succeeded.  It didn't take much to touch him and I desperately want to be more like that.  As he got older, he knew that his time here was running out and I can remember many times that he would tear up while praying over a meal.  Those tears were almost always for the family that he loved so dearly.

I could go on for many pages but I will finish with one that is very close to his family.

7.  "Make us ever mindful that there are people in this world who have need and have less than we." - When Granddad said the blessing, he finished each prayer that I ever remember with those words.  The funny thing is, he meant them every time he said them.  Now he meant this when it came to material things - ask anyone who didn't finish their meal about those Ethiopians.  But he also knew something that it took me 40 years of life to understand.  True riches aren't measured in what you have, they are measured in who you know.  While he will not go down in history as a man with much material wealth, he will go down as one of the most wealthy people ever because he knew how to love and realized early on what the real treasures of life were - people.

Granddad, I don't know if you can read this in Heaven or not but I want you to know that you are one of the greatest men I have ever had the privilege of knowing.  I can only hope to measure up to the standard you left.  I love you very much and hope to make you proud one day by being more like you.

To everyone else, I want to leave you with the lyrics of a song -

I've lost loved ones in my life
Who never knew how much I loved them
Now I live with the regret
That my true feelings for them never were revealed

So I made a promise to myself
To say each day how much she means to me
And avoid that circumstance
Where there's no second chance to tell her how I feel

Cause if tomorrow never comes
Will she know how much I loved her

So tell that someone that you love
Just what your thinking of
If tomorrow never comes

The Opinion of the Minion

A Minion's Good Judgment

Today I want to deal with the subject of judgment.  Don't you just love to be around people who are always judging you or someone else?  Those are my favorite types of people.  Well not really.  I very much dislike being around them.  But let's talk about judgment for a minute.  If you have ever been to church, you have heard the quote from the bible, "Judge not lest ye be judged."  We have taken that to mean that when I am around someone who hurts me or does bad things to me, that I can't judge them right.  I think this is very true.  I cannot judge a person period.

But what I can do is judge their actions.  It's OK to judge a person's actions.  But what I think we really like to do is use judging a persons actions as a spring board to get to what is really fun - judging people.  See I caught myself doing that here recently and honestly I didn't really even know I was doing it.  But before I get to that, let me talk about some things its OK to judge.

Sometimes we are around people who use this don't judge people thing as a way to manipulate us and hurt us.  All the while, they are saying that you can't judge them.  What they are really saying is they want you to continue to allow them to treat you badly.  That's not OK.  If you are around someone who is constantly hurting you, their actions are wrong and that is what I am judging.  I am not saying they are a bad person.  However, don't let people manipulate you into doing what they want if it is wrong.

While I am at it, let me step on a few more toes.  If someone comes up to you and tells you in a loving and kind way that they think you are behaving wrongly, consider what they say.  I know some people who are very difficult to correct because they cannot take someone telling them they are wrong.  I personally like to know when I am wrong (this is not an open invitation for you to correct me).  Let me say that I only trust a few people to tell me I am behaving wrongly.  Most of the time, I listen to my heart and the Lord will correct me where I need correction.  Be thankful when someone does that for you, if you know they really love and care about you.  For me personally, I don't want to go around being wrong.  Have you ever had that dream where you are walking around in your underwear or worse and everyone is laughing at you?  Well that's a little drastic but I think when we walk around constantly behaving wrong in an area, that is exactly what we are doing.

So let me tell you about the wrong kind of judgment.  I know this guy who was extremely judgmental to certain people in his life.  As a matter of fact, he really didn't like having them around.  Why, because some of them did do things that hurt his feelings.  Some of them did nothing to hurt his feelings.  He was just judgmental.  Now I don't know if he was ever judgmental outright to these people's faces but he certainly was in his heart.  He didn't really do it on purpose but he couldn't separate judging a person and judging their actions.  See some of their actions needed to be understood.  In some ways they used him but didn't know it.  So what did he do in return.  He got mad and judged them personally.  He considered himself a pretty humble guy.  He didn't go around openly telling everyone that he thought he was smart or successful.  He didn't go around showing off how much money he made or what he had (although many people thought this was the case).  As a matter of fact, he quit showing people the cool stuff he got and he quit telling people about the cool things that happened to him because some people got jealous.

Regardless of what they did to him, he began to judge himself as better than them.  Now here is where it gets a little strange.  He didn't judge himself smarter, or more successful, or more educated than the people around him.  That would have been too obvious.  He judged worse than that.  He began to see himself as nicer than them.  He would look at his wife and see all the times that she did things that were not nice toward him and only consider the nice things he did for her.  He is to this day a giver and began to feel that people took advantage of that.  So he judged himself to be a nicer and therefore better person than many of the people around him.

OK let me give you three guesses on this guy's identity.  Do you really need three guesses?  Yup, you know it.  This guy is me.  It is a very humbling experience when the Lord shows you that you aren't really all that.  Now I quit judging people before I started writing for the most part but I didn't realize that I was doing it.  It's easy for me to hear people saying nice things about this blog and some of the other stuff I do.  I even have a good friend who told me she thought I was a great guy.  She didn't mean it as one of those blow off things.  This girl really puts me on a pedestal.  She sees things in me that I didn't know were there.  As a matter of fact, there was a certain thing about the Minion that happened that shocked me.  She said that she was surprised it took as long as it did.  So guess what, the Minion isn't all that.  I have already done this in private but I want to go on record in front of you and ask God to forgive me for being judgmental.  That is truly a terrible thing to do and I am ashamed of it.  If I have judged you wrongly instead of just judging your actions, please forgive me.

So let me ask you a question?  Where are you being like I was?  Where are you judging people?  I bet that somewhere you are judging them instead of their actions.  That has to stop.  Do you like to sit around and talk about other people?  That's called gossip and it's very judgmental.  We have to stop that.

That's another Opinion of the Minion

A Minion's Hope

Today I want to talk to you about hope.  I belive the single most devistating thing that can happen in your life is to loose hope.  Hope is one of the most important parts of our lives but how often do we hear someone say, "Don't get your hopes up."  That is one the of the dumbest things I have ever heard.  I want you to get your hope sky high.  OK, I can immediately hear people saying, "He has flipped out.  I hoped that this would happen or that would happen and it didn't.  When I hoped for that situation to work out in my life and it didn't, that hurt me deeply and I would have been better of not to have gotten my hopes up at all." 

Let me say, I certainly understand your point.  I have done the same thing.  I got my hopes up that a certain area of my life would change and it didn't.  A few months ago, I got my hopes up about a certain relationship and that didn't work.  I used to get my hopes up all the time that I could go on a diet and loose weight.  I used to get my hopes up that I would be in a great relationship with a woman and that didn't work.  Even recently, I got my hopes up about a situation that didn't work out like I wanted.  So I should have just let it go.  I should have not hoped at all.  Think about it.  Wouldn't it have been better if I hadn't hoped.  If I had just expected failure.  That way I wouldn't have felt the disappointment and in some cases pain of the failure.  I can see what you mean by your question above.  Maybe you were even right.

Well, not so fast.  The critical question about hope is in what or where do I place it?  If I place my hope in you that you will do something or you place your hope in me that I will do something, at some point we will both be disappointed.  Why?  Because we aren't perfect.  Also, sometimes we put our hope in a person who isn't capable of doing what we want anyway.  Think of it this way, if you put your hope in me that I will be able to dunk a basketball.  I can 100% gaurantee you that you will be disappointed.  I am 5'7" tall and my verticle jump won't get me there.  That's not really important in the grand scheme of life but what if you put your hope in a friend or relationship to make you happy?

What if you looked to a girl or guy as the thing that was going to make you happy in life?  That other person is going to make a mistake somewhere and disappoint you.  It will probably hurt when they do.  See, they weren't made perfect so they are not capable of being perfect.  Everyone is going to make mistakes and when the mistake involves you, it is going to hurt.  "OK," you say, "if you want me to have hope and hope is so critical to my life, who or what do I put my hope in?"

Some of you who read this are ahead of me and know exactly where I am going.  That makes me smile.  I will tell you where I put my hope.  I put my hope in God.  He isn't just a train ticket to Heaven.  He is what keeps me going here.  I know that he cannot fail.  If I put my trust in him, there is no area we cannot conquer.  I desire with all my heart to have a godly mate.  I want a woman I can cherish, protect, care for, and grow with.  I want one that I can talk to.  You know my personal feelings from reading the Box.  So when I get around someone who I think is a good candidate, do I put my hope in her that she will be what I am seeking?  Nope, I put my trust in God.  He said He would provide all my needs so I put my hope in Him that He will provide what I need.  I don't hope in the woman, I hope in God.  When I do this, there is such great peace because no matter what comes up, my hope is in God.  If I have a good night or bad, it doesn't matter because my hope stays where it belongs.  Guess what, as I have done this, I have seen deliverance and help from God in every area where I put this to work. 

Recently on Facebook there was a person who stated that they were Wiccan (sp?).  My response was, Why?  I certainly respect their right to be Wiccan.  That wasn't really what I was asking.  Then someone else posted that this person was Wiccan because they chose their religion just like I did.  Well I appreciate their response as I do believe they were honestly trying to help me out but what I wanted to know is why did you chose to be Wiccan?  I can tell you why I choose to be a Christian.  It's because God still helps me everyday.  It's because when I call on Him, He answers.  It's because when things seem like they are coming apart, I can go to Him and He makes me to be at peace even though it looks like I am in deep trouble.  When I place my hope in Him, it centers and grounds me.  All of the sudden, my world turns right side up and things look good again.

And that's another Opinion of the Minion

A Message from the Lord of the Minion

Dear Friends,

This will be a different type of post for me but I know it is right.  If you are a minister, I ask that you read this with care and make sure I am hearing correctly.  I believe today, I have a letter from the Lord that is in my spirit that must be let out onto this blog.  Below please find that letter from the Lord.

My Dearest Child,

Long before you were born, I created this world and I gave it to my son Adam.  It was completely his and I intended for us to grow it together.  But Adam made a bad mistake.  He gave the authority over this world to a fallen angel you know as Satan.  Let me say, I have never stopped loving Adam.  I care about him as deeply today as I did back then.  It grieved me that he gave our authority to Satan but I still love him.

I deeply loved Satan before he fell from Heaven.  Both Satan and Adam are my creations and I had to let both make decisions that would hurt Me even though I loved them with all that I am.  Jesus was there with me when these things happened and I see love so deeply in him.  I love him.  It grieved us both to see our creation hurt and see where we knew things were headed.  But We don't quit.  Our love for you would never allow us to.  That separation that Adam caused between Us and Our creation was something we desperately wanted to close.  Our hearts yearned for Our creation even more than before the fall because of the separation that took place.  We couldn't be one with Our creation like we were before that day in the garden.

I had a plan all along to bridge the gap.  The problem with the sacrifices that took place before this was that Satan still had authority in the earth.  That was what happened when Adam ate of the tree I told him not to.  He gave authority I intended for us to share to Satan.  I needed something to take the authority back so that I could be close to you and live with you.  Before the cross, I could be around you and I could be close but I could not live inside you.  It's like Tommy said about the box.  I could admire and put things in you but I want to live in your box.  I want to get as close as possible to the inner part of your box.  I want to get so close that what's inside your box and I become one.  If someone looks inside your box, I do not want them to be able to distinguish between what is you and what is Me.

I want to give you everything I have.  I am constantly looking for ways to bless you.  Sometimes you reject my offers but I never stop offering.  You are still my most prized possession.  If you look in awe at the majesty of the mountains or the depths of the oceans or the stars of the heaven, they are nothing compared to the way I look at you.  You are all that I long for.

Before I could become one with you again, I needed to get the authority back to do so.  If I had tried to change things without doing this, it would have destroyed the world and I would have lost you forever.  The three of us (Jesus, the Holy Spirit and I) could not bear the thought of loosing you.  You are too precious to Me.  You are all that I want.  The only way to put that bridge in place so that I could live with you and love you the way that I really wanted was for there to be a perfect sacrifice for the sins of the world.  They included the ones that I knew you would commit after the cross and all the ones before.  For this to happen, We knew that We would have to send Jesus to as final payment for all the sin of our creation.  He decided He would go through great pain because of His love for you.

When We sent him to the earth, immediately some of his creation sought out to kill Him.  Imagine what it would be like for your son or daughter to be so misguided that they tried to take your life.  That's what was happening then.  Our creation didn't know Us.  I protected him because We all knew what He had to do.  I sent him into the wilderness to be tempted by the devil.  I had to make sure he faced every opportunity to sin that the rest of Our creation has faced.  And he did.  But he held fast to me and blocked every temptation.  After that, he got to do what he loves more than anything.  Even though they didn't know they were his creation, We blessed Our creation through him.  We got to give out little glimpses of our love.  And we enjoyed it.  We got to heal the sick, proclaim liberty to the captives, provide food for people that needed, we got to give dead people back to their loved ones.  We got to give money to people that needed it.  We got to spend three years walking the earth in human form and blessing it.  It was such a joyous time for us.  Jesus loved his time on the earth with his creation.  We waited until the time was right and then set about redeeming Our creation and putting the bridge in place that would allow Us to come live in your box and be one with you.



Many will say that I am an angry God looking for ways to hurt my creation but I am not.  I love my creation too deeply to do anything that would harm it.  It is all I love.  Many of my sons and daughters are anxiously awaiting my son Jesus' second coming.  That will be a sad day for me because many of those that I love more than anything will have made a choice not to live with me and be with me.  I love them enough to let them decide but it hurts Me when they don't want Me.  I want you to know that I love you today.  I have always loved you and I always will love you.  I am God but I want to be your Father.  I want to spend time with you.  I want us to enjoy your life together.  I want you to be successful and fulfilled all the days of your life.  I want nothing but the best for you.  Bad things happen in this life to people but I don't do bad things to my loved ones.  Little children, you are all I care about and desire.  I have gold and beauty you haven't seen yet but I seek after you.

Ladies and Gentlemen, it is with great fear and trembling that I submit this letter from the Lord.

For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten son that whosoever believeth on him should not perish but have eternal life.

Tommy Oswald (The Minion that God so passionately, deeply and committedly loves)

My Greatest Failure

Today, I want to talk about failure.  Now, most of the time I try to write positive and upbeat blogs.  When I read what I write, it challenges me to be a better person.  I have always said that if what you see from me is the best you ever see then that is a tragedy because I should get better every day.  But failure is inevitable in life.  We all go through it at some point.  So how do we deal with it?  Does it hurt?  Absolutely.  Do I wish I hadn't failed?  Sure.  Did I fail?  Yes.  Let me use one of my favorite lines from the movie Dirty Dancing, "When I'm wrong, I say I'm wrong."  You have to own your failures and successes.

See, I am recently divorced.  I made a commitment before God to stay married to a woman for the rest of my life.  It was a covenant that I couldn't keep.  Now I won't go into all the reasons behind the divorce itself because they aren't important.  Some of my readers know me personally and thus will know my now, ex-wife.  Let me say something about her before I go forward.  I wish her only the best and most happy days in life.  I have done my best to walk through this divorce with integrity and honor.  Have I always been successful?  No.  But this lady, deserves to be happy.  She is a wonderful mother to our three kids and I am very sorry things didn't work out between us.  I want to publicly forgive her for any wrong doing toward me and I ask the same from her.  This is my greatest failure in life.

Do you want to hear all the juicy details of what happened?  Would you like me to blame my wife for our marriage falling apart?  Well, I won't tell you because those things are personal.  Let me just use an old saying, "It takes two to Tango."  We both made mistakes and here we are.

So now let's deal with how it made me feel.  Last Friday was one of the hardest and most rewarding days of my life.  Although we have been separated for over a year and I knew the final divorce decree was coming, I still didn't really believe it.  So when the pressure of the week was over, it hit me like a ton of bricks.  I realized that I gave my word to my God and to that lady and I didn't keep it.  I hope you cannot imagine the deep pain I felt.  For a little while, I felt like a complete failure.  What things in your life have caused you to feel this way?  Was it a relationship that ended badly?  Was it a failure at your job or at school?  Regardless of where it comes from, it still really hurts.

When you get that sinking feeling in your gut because of something like this, doesn't it make you just want to run away and hide from everyone?  I mean who would want to be around someone that was a total failure like me?  I told myself that I was the biggest loser ever.  That I had wrecked my life, the life of my kids and my ex-wife.  I was well on my way to beating myself senseless because of my failure.  I threw a world class guilt party.  I was the guest of honor, the entire guest list, the guy who trashes the guest of honor and the guy who throws him in the dumpster at the end of the party.  I invited a very special guest to this party and He wouldn't come.  Can you imagine the audacity of being invited to the Destroy the Minion party and not coming?  That was certainly rude don't you think?  Do you know who the only guest that I actually invited was?  It was God.  I wanted him to condemn me just like I was doing to myself.  I wanted him to tell me that I was worthless and no good just like I was telling myself.

Now, I asked him to forgive me and I knew that he would at some point maybe a few months from now after I really got a thrashing.

When I finally listened to his still small voice, all I could feel was his love for me.  It is a love that I will never, ever deserve but it's there.  I can't escape it.  Do you know when he actually forgave me for my greatest failure?  When did He finally forgive me for breaking a covenant that I made in front of Him?  The instant I asked for it.  I didn't have to wait three weeks.  It was instantaneous.  He knew before the foundation of the world that I would make mistakes and he forgave me as soon as I asked.  That is the reason Jesus shed his blood on the cross.  It was to erase my sin.  If I asked God to forgive me now, he wouldn't know what I was talking about because He is a forgive and forget God.  He doesn't hold these things against me.  Guess what, when you ask Him for forgiveness, He does the same thing toward you.  He loves you unconditionally, no matter what, all the time, forever and ever with every fibre of His being.  He only wants good things for your life and He can take our bad mistakes and turn them into something good.  He doesn't want the bad mistakes because He hates to see us in the pain that they cause but He has a million ways to make things OK.

Back to the Guilt Party - It's fine that God forgave me but I am still at this party.  After all, if he won't have the decency to show up, I will do his job for him.  I will beat myself silly.  I can call myself all kinds of ugly names.  I mean I know all my deepest, darkest secrets and who better than me to dredge them all up and use them against me now.  Here is my major problem with this.  If God won't condemn me and trash me out, what right do I have to do it.  If he is willing to extend forgiveness to me what right do I have to keep holding the grudge against myself?  So here's what I did.  At 4:24 on Friday, July 29, 2011, I forgave myself.  When it happened, it was like the weight of the world was lifted off my shoulders.  I felt so light and good.  I felt like it was OK for me to be happy again.  All of the sudden the world turned right side up.  God totally wrecked my party and I am so glad He did.

Have you ever felt this way?  I have watched many people do this to themselves so I know that I am not alone.  I think most of us have.  What are you refusing to forgive yourself for?  If someone who did you wrong came to you with an honest and sincere repentance on their face and asked you to forgive them for something they did wrong, would you do it?  I think probably you would.  So why can't you forgive yourself?  If you ask God for forgiveness he gives it to you instantly.  All I am asking is for you to extend the same grace to yourself that he did.  I know this is a process and I want to encourage you to keep at it.

Well friends, I intended this blog to talk about my greatest failure which it did but I can honestly say that I have blogged myself happy again.

And that's another Opinion of His Minion

What is the Definition of You?

Hi Guys and Gals,

While DD and I are working on the next part of Friendship vs. Dating, I wanted to take a few minutes to discuss who defines you?  I was asked by a friend of the Minion,  MW, to write about this subject.  MW, thank you so much for your encouragement on FaceBook.  I really appreciate it.

So lets talk about it.  What is the definition of You?  One definition is "used to indicate a specific individual."  This is from The American Heritage Dictionary.  That doesn't tell me anything about you so it's not very helpful.  Since the dictionary can't help where do we turn?  Should we turn to the people around us?  How about our parents?  How about the people we work with?  Can they give us a good definition of who we are?

I think we look to the people around us a lot.  And while they may know some things about us, I don't think they are the best place to look.  This article was started based on "The Football Player Who Couldn't Play."  In it, I talked about wanting to play football but being a terrible player.  I thought that I would be in the right crowd if I was a player.  Why did I think that?  Because most of the popular kids in school were football players.  I was letting the people around me define what I should be.  In that case, it was a bad thing.  What if people say that to be in the right crowd, I have to do drugs or have sex?  Then I can only define myself as "good" if I am doing drugs and having sex.  Does that sound crazy?  It should because it is.

Now, lets move forward a few years.  When are parents talk about being successful, many times they want us to be doctors or lawyers and it seems like that is a good standard for defining whether or not you are a "success."  So maybe, we can look to the world's standard to define us or at least who we should be.  So let me tell you something personal about me.  I am a lawyer.  At least I have a law license.  I have passed the bar exam in Texas.  So the good news is that based using worldly standards, I can define myself as a success right.  Absolutely wrong.  Being a lawyer, doctor, janitor, policeman, or a dentist doesn't define me or you.

So we have looked at the crowd we hang out around and "the worldly standard" to define us without finding a good place.  Where should we look next?

As you can probably guess, this is where I was headed all along.  Especially if you are a Christian, you should look at that book we carry to church on Sunday.  I can tell you some things from that book about you.

1.  You are loved.  God has an intense burning love for you.  He isn't sitting back trying how to knock you down, he is sitting back waiting for you to take him up on his promises.  His love is more passionate for you than words can describe.  Did you know his heart aches just to spend time with you and tell you much he loves and admires you?

2.  You are headed to Heaven when you are done here.  I have never been but the Bible describes it as a pretty cool place.

3.  You can overcome every trial.  The bible says that we overcome the world by the blood of the Lamb and the word of our testimony.

Well, you get the point.  I could go on for pages defining you from the bible.

"OK Mr. Minion, that's fine," you say, "but how do I know who I am and what I am supposed to do here on earth?  How do I know what I am supposed to like and not like, etc.?"  Who defines that part of us?  The answer is a little hard to swallow.  It's not your parents, your family, your friends or anyone else.  Who defines you? - The answer is You should define yourself and no one else.  Why?  Because no one can truly look inside your box and see all that is there besides you.  Even if your family and friends have your best interest at heart, they cannot define you.  The don't have the ability to do that.  Who you are is something between you and God.  Just like me playing football (or at least being on the team) you are the only one who knows what you really like.

I can't tell you how often I have heard a boy or girl say they liked something their boyfriend or girlfriend did just to get approval from them.  You cannot define who you are to get approval from someone else.  If you do that, you miss out on so much of the great potential God as deposited in your life.  Guess what, no matter how hard you try to be liked by doing what other people like or saying what they say, some peole won't like you.  This past weekend, I ran into a guy who has hated me for 10 years.  No matter what I say or do, I can't change that. 

When I went to law school, most of my family didn't believe that I would make it through.  I am not saying that they didn't have a reason to believe that.  Because based on my performance at college, they were expecting me to do the same thing and I would have failed.  If I had listened to them, I would never have even tried to go to school, much less graduate has high in my class as I did.  Am I saying that to brag?  No.  I am telling you this to say, don't let anyone else define you because their definition will be incomplete at best and completely wrong at worst.  They will miss some of the great things inside of you.

Let me close by saying, dare to step outside of the shadows of what other people think.  Dare to step outside of what society thinks.  Step up and be what you want you to be.  You will be much happier if you do.

And that's another Opinion of the Minion