Give Her a Chance

Today I want to talk about something very cool that I did.  Now it may not be that great to you but it felt great to me.  I also learned that I did the same thing the Lord does for us.  Tonight I put my daughter K in a place where she could eventually make her way to the US Gymnastics Team!  Before anyone says anything, it is not my expectation that the does this.  And I will definitely love her whether she ever makes the team or even stays in gymnastics at all.  Either way I am proud to be her dad and I told her that in no uncertain terms tonight.  She knew that this was a place she could dream and if she worked really hard, she might have an opportunity to live that dream.  Let me tell you, I would be one proud dad if she does (but I am one proud dad now so it really doesn't matter).

As I was talking to the gymnastics people today, I found out that K was in the level two class.  If she does well she will be invited to join the level two team in the spring.  This will mean competitions locally and one national competition at the age of eight.  I think both of these are great opportunities for her to challenge and push herself.  I fully support that.  Now if she stays on track, she can make it up to level 10.  At level 10 she goes to a local competition.  If she wins she moves to regional and then national and then it's on to the Olympics!  Even though a lot of kids start down this track, not many of them become Gabby Douglas.  But one of them just might and why can't it be my daughter K?  The answer is, it most certainly can.

This thing has been bouncing around in my spirit since I figured it out a few hours ago and I can see the reason as I write this.  See God does the same thing for us that I have done for K.  He gives us a chance to achieve our dreams.  Many don't but it's not God's fault, it's ours.  If K doesn't go on to be an Olympian, it won't be my fault, it will be because she either chose to take a different path or she didn't dedicate herself to living that dream.  I think we do this in real life all the time.  God gives us an opportunity and we either don't work at it or we decide to do something else.  Regardless of what we do, the doors to our success are right there.

I hear people that are waiting on God to drop success on them like He dropped manna from Heaven on the Israelites in the desert but he doesn't work that way.  I also hear people that say He will just work everything out for their good regardless of what they do or don't do and this isn't true.  The Bible says He has a good plan for our lives and it also says He blesses the works of our hands.  If there isn't work from our hands, He doesn't have something to bless.  Now K is in the same place.  If she works hard and dedicates herself to gymnastics, she has a chance to be the best.  But if she doesn't work hard and eat right, etc., it won't happen. The choice is hers and I believe that the choice is ours when it comes to how successful we allow God to make us.

So let me leave you with this challenge.  If you are waiting for God to drop success on you, don't wait start doing something He can bless and see how He works.  The other challenge is this - find someone who is attempting to live out their dream and give them a helping hand.  Give them a chance.  You will be glad you did.

That's another Opinion of the Minion.

The Lens

Today I want to talk about The Lens.  What is The Lens?  Good question.  I'm glad you asked.  Before I talk about The Lens, let's talk about lenses in general for a minute.  When I think of lenses, I think of glasses.  Have you ever put on prescription glasses that weren't yours?  Everything looks very distorted doesn't it?  I used to wear glasses but I had lasik surgery several years ago and don't need them now.  I didn't wear them at all until I was an adult.

I will never forget this.  It was my first year of law school and I had to drive to Dallas and back to Fort Worth everyday because the classes were in Dallas.  Now on the way home, everything was always a little fuzzy at night.  The lights weren't clear and I always had trouble seeing the street signs on the freeway.  Then one day, I went to see an eye doctor and I was prescribed glasses.  I got my first pair of glasses from a Wal-Mart off of Rufe Snow Drive in Fort Worth and I will never forget the day.  I put the glasses on and walked outside.  I was completely amazed at all that I could see.  It was as if scales had fallen off my eyes and it was amazing.  If you have ever had glasses, you completely understand.

So what is The Lens?  The Lens is what we see life through.  It's what we look through when we see other people.  It's also what we look through when we look in the mirror.  The Lens effects everything.  The thing I want to focus on for a minute is how the lens effects the way we see other people.

Have you ever seen someone you thought was strange or weird?  What makes them weird?  It's the way they look when you compare them to yourself or other people.  See I believe that we are all a little weird in our own ways.  But what if you are looking at that person through the wrong lens and instead of being weird they are actually just unique.  I think sometimes if we would take off our glasses that filter what is cool and what isn't we will find some very amazing individuals.  I think we should all look at other people through a certain lens though - the lens of love.

Now I am not talking about the mushy gushy feeling you get when you are around your boyfriend or girlfriend, what I mean is that we should love everyone.  God does.  Does that shock you?  God loves sinners.  Now I can already hear you screaming that he doesn't but it's true.  God only hates the sin but he loves everyone.  That means he can feel when others hurt even if they aren't living exactly the way he wants them to.  I say if it's good enough for God, it's good enough for us.  So let me ask you who are you looking at and seeing the wrong thing?  As you walk through tomorrow in this Christmas season, would you look at everyone you are near through a lens of love?  That's a tough thing to do but well worth it.

And that's another Opinion of the Minion

Courage

Today I want to talk about courage.  We all know that our military men and women are very courageous and that they have and will lay down their lives in the face of danger.  Policemen and firemen would do the same.  We have stories about people giving their lives for others which is a very courageous thing to do.  As a matter of fact, Jesus did this very thing for us a long time ago.  But today I want to talk about having courage to live life and face problems.

This is a whole different type of courage.  As we enter the Christmas season it is very easy for some people to withdraw emotionally and feel dis-couraged based on their circumstances.  I know that for many years, I didn't have enough money to do the things I wanted for my family at Christmas and it would make me depressed.  I didn't want to go to Christmas parties or watch Christmas movies.  I viewed everything surrounding Christmas as a chore.  Christmas cards went out and gifts were given - the job got done but that wasn't really living.  Do you know what courage is?  Courage is being in a situation that you don't really like and deciding to make the best of it regardless of whether it feels good or not.  Courage is staring at the things in your life that you don't like about yourself or your situation and not letting it stop you from living and enjoying life.

But for years I was unable to face my weight problems or my financial problems.  I was just too afraid to admit that I had them.  Why?  Because then my life wouldn't be so perfect.  And my life was perfect.  it was perfectly wooden.  I was living dead because I didn't have the courage to face my short comings.

Have you ever faced depression?  It takes real courage to recognize it and decide that you are going to do something about it.  See depression is a very serious problem and if your not careful it can kill you.  So what do you call someone who has faced that monster and overcome it?  Courageous.

I knew of a situation where someone was depressed to the point of wanting to commit suicide.  Now the story goes that this person was a young person.  While it's not uncommon, what seemed strange to me about this story was that the person had low self esteem when that person easily could have been just the opposite.  This person was very attractive, smart, caring, funny, had a magnetic personality and extremely gifted but also battling depression.  One thing that caught my attention specifically about this story was that the person in it was strong enough to admit there was a problem and ask for help despite all the fear many fears of doing it.  That person is my hero!  I only hope that I will have that kind of courage when I need it.

That's another Opinion of the Minion

Consistence

OK today I want to talk about consistence.  That's a good word even though it can be a hard one.  I heard a preacher named Gloria Copeland say that God told her that in consistency lies the power.  I think this is such a true statement.

As many of you may know I went to law school and have my license so I am a lawyer in Texas even though I don't practice law very much.  Now when I went to law school, I was determined to give it my best shot and whether or not I failed, I was going to try hard and I was very successful.   Right after I realized I was going to do fine in law school, my goal changed to becoming a lawyer.  I wanted to try cases like Perry Mason (He was a lawyer on an old TV show and I think he won ever case except for a couple.).  I was determined that I was going to be the best trial lawyer ever.  Guess what.  After my first year of law school I was so high in my class I got asked to be on the law review which is a pretty prestigious deal.  I was doing great.  Now after that first year, what if I walked up to you and said, I'm through year one of school and I'm not a lawyer yet so I quit!!

You would have probably looked at me and said something like - Well you can't be a lawyer yet.  You haven't made it through the next two years of school and you have to take (and pass) the bar exam.  It's ridiculous for you to think you should be a lawyer yet.  Just hang in there and do what it takes to get to your goal.  You have to consistently chase it for a few more years before it gets there.  If I then said - That's it I don't care if I'm not supposed to be one yet, I quit anyway.  You would probably think something was wrong with me.  And you would be right.

But I have done this many times and I have seen other people do this more times than I can count.  No, I'm not talking about quitting law school but I have seen so many other people quit on their dreams before they ever had a chance to materialize.  The reason they quit was because they expected to reach their goal without doing what was necessary to get there.

Let me use another example that will bring this closer to home.  As many of you know, I used to weigh 350 pounds.  What if I tried to diet for two weeks and got frustrated because I hadn't lost all the weight I thought I should and I quit?  Let me see a show of hands from anyone who has ever tried to lose weight and quit your diet when you didn't see immediate results.  OK put your hand down, I can't count all the hands!  I did it myself more than once.  See for me to lose the weight I had to consistently eat the right things and exercise over 14 months to get where I wanted to be.

But that's not the only place it can effect you.  How many of you were believing to get out of debt and haven't?  Well don't quit.  If you will consistently spend less money than you make, you will come out of debt.  How many of you have pursued a dream to be a writer or an engineer or a singer or something else?  Well don't quit!!!  If you will keep pursuing your dream, you can achieve it.

I want to leave you with one thought that is a little harder than the ones above.  How many of you started believing God for something and you haven't seen it yet?  Maybe you are believing for a loved one to be saved or someone to be healed.  Maybe you are believing God to heal your marriage or something else.  Maybe the situation looks pretty bad right now and you don't see how God is going to fix your problem.  Maybe you wonder if He even wants to do it.  Well let me tell you that God does want to fix your problems but He needs you to have faith and the right actions to go with it.  He needs you to be consistent with doing them and He will see you through!!

That's Another Opinion of the Minion

Perspective

Today's post is all about the word perspective.  Have you ever heard the saying, "One man's trash is another man's treasure"?  Well that can certainly be the truth.  Because I live in the United States, the first perspective issue that comes to mind is our recent national elections.  I can tell you that I have definitely heard a lot of different perspectives about President Obama getting re-elected.  When I look at my personal Facebook page, some people say it's the greatest thing to happen to America and others say it's the end of the world as we know it.  The answer is probably somewhere in the middle.  Where?  I'm not going to guess.  What I find interesting is that so many people look at this whole election like it's a sporting event.  Once they decided who got their vote, they were more interested in seeing that person win so they could be on the winning side.  Seems a little silly to me.

But let's talk about another issue of perspective.  I have told this story once before but it's worth repeating.  As many of you may know, I am a runner.  I wasn't always a runner like I am now.  When I weighed 350 pounds I ran alright but it was typically to the nearest buffet.  Even then, I only ran from the parking lot to the buffet.  But at this point in my life, I have been delivered from that awful weight problem and I actually run several miles each week.  I've even ran a couple of marathons.  Pretty cool right?  Well let me tell you when I was fat if someone said I would run six miles one day, I would have thought that was impossible.  When I was training for my marathon, six miles was practically a day off.  I could almost run that in my sleep.  It's all about perspective right?

Here is another example that really shook me.  One day I was running and for whatever reason, I had a slow run.  Obviously slow is relative but compared to what I was used to doing, that day I ran slow.  After my workout, I hit my usual morning spot on the way to the office - Starbucks.  I was a little mopey on the inside as I went through the front door.  That slow run sort of started my day off wrong and I was pouting on the inside.  I walked past a guy in a wheel chair and headed to counter just like normal.  Now I wasn't being rude, I just wasn't being overly friendly because I was in a bad mood.  This is when the Lord gave me a real lesson on perspective.  Now I only think I have heard the audible voice of God once in my life and this certainly wasn't that time.  What I heard was down on the inside. 

The Lord said to me, "Do you see that man sitting in the wheelchair?"
"Yes I do."
"Well he would give almost anything to be able to run as slow as you did this morning."

That certainly jerked the slack out of me and it really made me thankful for the ability to run.

See I think there are many things in life that we look at from one perspective and take it for granted.  If we could see things from a different perspective it might make us much more thankful for what we have.  I know people who have lost a loved one that maybe they took for granted while they were here.  Now they only wish they could have the time to be with them.  What are you taking for granted?  Is it a person or a job or maybe it's just the ability to see or walk?  I challenge you to find something you take for granted and spend a second looking at it from a different perspective.  See if you aren't thankful for it after you do.

That's another Opinion of the Minion

Dirty Politics

Hello Everyone,

I spent a lot of time talking about politics. And I think that it's important to give politics it's due. But it saddens me to see so many people get so excited and so animated about this subject and then when it's over the excitement goes with it.

I wonder what would happen if people channeled the same fervor and excitement that they have for the political issues and directed it toward constructive pursuits.  What would happen if we got very excited about helping our young people today?  What would happen if feeding people that needed food got as much a tension as much excitement as whether or not it's okay to burn the US flag or not?  What would happen if people got as excited about loving their neighbor as they did about condemning their neighbors choice and political party?

I think we would live in a vastly different world. Guess what poverty, low self-esteem, financial need, and  stress those don't have a real political party. So let me ask all my politically active friends what are you doing every day to help someone else in need?  Jesus praised people by saying, "When I was hungry you fed me when I was imprisoned you came to visit me when I was in need of clothing you gave me clothing."   He never said when I ran for political office you bombarded Facebook or the social media of the day with long laborious posts condemning the other party.  He didn't mention how you should vote.  When He judged people, he said, "When I was hungry you didn't feed me, when I was naked you didn't clothe me and when I was in jail you didn't visit."

Now before my far right wing or far left wing readers write me some critical comments, let me say that I am not against anyone voting there conscious.  As a matter of fact, I plan to early vote and I have already made up my mind how I am going to vote.  Many Americans gave their lives over the last 250+ years to give me that right and I plan to honor them with my vote.  I am completely for voting and doing what's right for this country.  I'm just appalled by what I hear through the media, Facebook and other places about politics from what some public entertainment figure has to say to what the left and right media have to say.

What troubles me is that I don't hear much about people helping others.  I remember one time I helped someone by giving them some supplies that they needed for their young kids.  The Lord told me to give them so much and I decided to give more than what the Lord asked me to do.  Now let me say that I did not hear the audible voice of God telling me to do anything.  I just knew in my spirit it was the right thing to do.  Anyway, after I gave them what the Lord told me to plus some, I felt like the Lord was smiling at me and was proud of me for what I did.  It was like He was saying, "Son, you act like me more and more!"  As I sat there in the car that day, I wept with joy at being that close to God and knowing that I pleased him.  I have never ever had that feeling or anything close from trying to make a political point. 

So what am I trying to tell you today?  What I'm saying is that it's high time we got off the sidelines and quit just talking about what needs to be done how we should vote what the right politician is doing or not doing and it's time that we stepped out and started making a difference in somebody's life.  So I want to encourage you today. After you're done voting and making speeches and talking about what's right and wrong with America please take the time to find that single mom and your church that needs a helping hand and give her some help. That's what causes me to have pride in America.  It's seeing Americans helping Americans not bickering and arguing about the political system or who should be in office but just an American helping someone who needs help!

That's Another Opinion of the Minion

Sitting at Starbucks

Tonight I am sitting outside of Starbucks in Fort Worth.  My friends who know me personally would be shocked that I am here (not really - I come to Starbucks a couple of times a day for Earl Grey tea).  As I sit here tonight, the weather is beautiful.  It's in the mid 70s and we got a little rain earlier.  People are walking around and talking and generally enjoying the night.  So tonight I want to talk about love.

I harp on this subject a lot because I see so much hatred in the world.  Tonight, everyone around me seems to be having a good time but we all know that hate is around here somewhere.  Now my girlfriend D and I had a discussion last night about politics and some of the more hot topic issues that always seem to come up.  Now as I said in one of my very first blogs, I know that there are definitely issues that need to be addressed and they are serious.  Whether or not you are for or against same sex marriages or abortion or flag burning or you fill in the blank.  I want to challenge you to love people.  I sat at lunch with my good friend J to day and this is one of the things he and I discussed.  Not love specifically but allowing others to have a different opinion and still being able to love and appreciate the person.

Regardless of whether you are a die hard Republican or die hard Democrat, God calls us to love people.  Did you know that Jesus died on the cross for your sins and yet He gives each of us the free will to go to Hell if that's what we chose?  Guess what, He will love you all the way there.  He will hate that you chose to go but He will love you and respect your decision and opinion on the subject.  Did you know that when they nailed Him to that cross He said, forgive them Father for they no not what they do.  He could have called 10,000 angels to get him off that cross and destroy the world but He chose not to do it.  He chose to love those who were putting Him to death.

Now I know a lot of us would like to walk around in the same power that Jesus walked the earth.  I think the reason that it doesn't happen is that we wouldn't say forgive them.  We would call the 10,000 angels to wipe out anyone who doesn't agree with our position, political party or choice of snow cone flavor.  Folks, this isn't the right way to run a railroad.

Now I am not saying that you shouldn't have an opinion and I do believe that you should stand up for who you are.  Guess what I have seen both sides of the isle work to run the other one over.  What I am telling you is stop the hate.  If you can't express your opinion in love, then don't express it until you can.   Quit making fun of or speaking badly of people who don't share the same opinion as you and start walking in love.

That's Another Opinion of the Minion

Faith

Today I want to talk about faith.  Did you know you have faith?  "Well, wait a minute," I can hear you say, "I'm not even a Christian.  I don't believe in that faith stuff."  My friend I beg to differ with you.  You do have faith.  What you have faith in is a totally different question.  While I was working out at the gym today, my trainer showed me a video of the guy who recently jumped out of that balloon from the edge of space.  Did you know he had faith?  In what?  Gravity.  He believed that he would return to earth when he jumped out of that capsule.  If he hadn't believed it, he would never have jumped out.

See we operate in faith all the time.  When you get out of bed, you have faith that you will be able to stay on the floor (gravity again).  You have faith that you are breathing air.  You have faith that the round ball in the sky providing light is the sun.  We have faith in all kinds of things.  Yes some of us have faith in God and that's a very good thing.  According to the bible, the opposite of faith is fear.

Fear is faith that something bad is going to happen.  If you have fear that you are going to die in a car accident, you are really saying that you have faith that this will come to pass in your life.  That's not a good thing.  Now I know some people will say that they had faith in God for this to happen or that and it didn't.  Why didn't your faith work?  I can't say for sure.  There are a lot of reasons that you may not have received what you wanted.  But let's look at the other side, there are many times when we fear something will happen and it doesn't.

I am amazed sometimes at how much fear and faith we see everyday.  Some fear is stronger than others but some faith is stronger than others as well.  I want you to know that fear and faith are not equal even though they are opposites.  Faith in God will always beat fear.  So let me ask you what you are afraid of today?  In the last couple of weeks I have been afraid of a certain thing.  But here's what I learned, when I started trusting God and putting my faith in him, that fear had to shrink away.  So let me ask you this?  Where is your faith?

Is it in something bad or something good?  The answer is something you have to decide but know this - you will operate in faith in many things today.  You only get to chose what you have faith in.

That's another Opinion of the Minion

What to Do When the Cross Gets Heavy

Today this keeps running around in my head.  Now earlier this week it was for me but I sense it's for someone else today.  I posted this on the Minion Facebook page and on my personal Facebook page at different times this week.  It's the lyrics to a song called "Through the Fire" and it's performed by a group called The Crabb Family.

The lyrics that keep impacting me are these - "He never promised that the cross would not get heavy or the hill would not get hard to climb.  He never offered our victory without our fighting but He said help would always come in time.  Just remember when your standing in the Valley of Decision and the adversary says give in, just hold on.  My God will show up and He will take you through the fire again."  Those words are so true and they have impacted me greatly several times in my life.  This past week I went through a bit of a fire of my own making.  I'm thankful for friends and a wonderful woman who helped me see it for what it was.  I also gave myself permission to not be perfect this week.  Thank God for His grace.

Now I want you to think about something for a minute.  Put yourself in a room that is on fire.  You are standing in the middle of the room and everywhere you turn there is fire.  You can't see windows through the smoke and the flames.  What are you thinking about at this moment.  Chances are you see and think nothing but smoke and flames.  You're in a bad spot and there doesn't seem any way out of it.  What do you do?  There is no way to put out the flames so you will either go through or get burned.

Obviously this exact situation doesn't happen to many of us.  But what about when you are up against a school project that's due tomorrow?  Or maybe you are in a relationship that doesn't work right.  Maybe your financial picture is all messed up and you don't see any way out.  The list of possible bad situations could go on and on but I hope you see my point.  Regardless of what you are facing, I want you to know that God never promised you wouldn't face trouble.  The only way that happens is after you go to Heaven.  Before that event, you will see trials and tests.

What I want you to understand is that there isn't a situation that can possibly go on in your life that God can't handle.  Now here's where I get in the most trouble.  I have a tendency to meditate the problem for hours.  The thought of meditating God's promise over the situation can escape me at times.  Have you ever been like that?  I have been in situations recently that weren't near as big as I thought they were but because I focused solely on the problem it grew out of proportion.  On top of that, I never trusted God with the issue.

But when I finally woke up and took the issue I faced to God, He was right there waiting for me.  Guess what I didn't have to move at all to get to Him.  All I had to do was turn around and He was right there.  The Bible says He will never leave you nor forsake you.

So if you are going through tough times stop and trust God.  He never said life would be easy but He did say He would bring you through all the trials if you trust Him.

That's Another Opinion of the Minion

One Degree

Today I want to talk about direction and goals.  First of all, is it important to have goals?  Well for some it may not be.  I know some people who's personalities really don't lend themselves to concrete goals.  They meander through life and enjoy it.  For them it is a peaceful way to live and goals really mess things up.  For me, that would be a difficult way to live but I must admit that there are days when I envy them.  I am not a hard core goal nut who has to have a goal for everything in life (at least I don't think I am) but I do think that goals are important.

After all, if you don't know where you are going, how will you know when you get there right?  That's where I think goals are important.  For many of you who read this blog, your goal might be to graduate high school or college.  You may have never thought of it that way but if you are in high school, your goal is definitely to get out right?

Well after we get out of college goals can be a little more vague.  For most, the goal is to get married, raise a family, provide for retirement, etc.  But I know so many people who really don't have any plan for their lives and after we are adults, I think that is not healthy.  Let's say your goal is to get out of debt.  What is the plan?  How are you going to cut spending or increase your income?  Is that plan realistic.  Let me take you back a couple of years to when I first really started financial goals.  Back then, I used budgets to justify going further into debt.  Harry Potter movies were more realistic than my budgets.  So are your goals something you can measure?  Remember if you don't have a destination, how will you know when you get there?

Now I want to get to my point for this e-mail.  Sometimes we set goals for ourselves and we come up with good plans to get where we want to be.  For many of us, it is to be good parents and take care of our children.  For me, one of my biggest goals is to walk closer with God.  Now that goal is a great one but it is a little hard to measure.  When I was losing weight, I could step on a scale and the number it displayed would tell me if I was progressing toward my goal or not.  But with my walk with God, I didn't have as concrete or measurable goal.

But here is what I noticed recently.  I have drifted a little away from the Lord.  Now I didn't backslide to hell by any means and I didn't fall into sin or deny Christ or anything close to that.  However, I did notice I was not a peace.  I hit times that weren't as fun as they should be and I couldn't figure out why.  While this isn't the only reason for my frustration, it is an important one.  I knew I had to get back to a closer walk with the Lord.  As I made a fresh commitment to walk closer to Him, I noticed that I didn't have to turn and run back to where I last felt close.  See He followed me on my journey.  The Bible says He will never leave you nor forsake you and He didn't.  He was right there when I went looking for him.  It was great and definitely refreshing.

One of the big questions in my mind was how did I get to this place were I had lost my peace.  I didn't hurt anyone; cuss anyone; do wrong that I knew of so what happened.  The answer is I got one degree off course.  I didn't take His presence seriously enough in my day to day life.  I quit praying as much as I should.  I quit reading His word and my daily devotional with as much attention as I should.  The next thing I knew I was out of peace.  Did you know that if an airplane starts flying from Fort Worth to Paris and it is only one degree off course it can wind up miles and miles from it's goal?  Well that's exactly what I think happened to me.

So let me leave you with this.  What are your goals in life?  Have you ever woken up to find yourself way off course?  If so, all you have to do is rededicate to your goals and set your course straight.  Then take time regularly to check and see if you are still headed where you want to go.  If you aren't simply fix the course.  Many of you may not be where you want to be with Christ at this particular moment.  If that's so, getting back to where you need to be with him is easy because even if you quit paying attention to Him, He never left your side.  If that's you, would you pray this simple prayer.  "Father, please forgive me.  I strayed from my course with you.  Please help me get back into Your perfect will for my life."  If you prayed that prayer, then you are back at the right place with God.  Now search His will out for your life and get ready for the adventure of a lifetime.

That's another Opinion of the Minion

What Have You Done Lately?

Words.  We hear them everyday from all sorts of places.  We hear songs on the radio, watch TV shows, talk to other people and we even hear our own words.  I think I heard that the average person speaks 10,000 words a day.  Which means that the average person hears at least that many every day and probably more.  That's a lot.

So today I want to talk about words, indirectly anyway.  See we hear things all the time and we say things all the time.  I tell my girlfriend, D, that I love her regularly.  Those words sound great and they feel great to say.  What's even better is when I hear her tell me the same thing back.  It feels awesome and I know she means them.  But how do I know she means what she says?  Or how does she know that I mean what I say?  The answer is really simple.  It doesn't require a great leap of faith or many hours of prayer and fasting to figure it out.

All D has to do to know if my words are true is watch my actions.  Do they line up with my words?  I tell her that I love her and then I do my best to show her that I love her.  I consciously consider whether or not my actions are lining up with my words.

This same thing applies to other places as well.  If I tell someone that I will do something and I don't then my actions and words don't line up.  I remember several months ago, I promised to take all the kids to a place called Main Event here in Fort Worth.  This place has bowling, laser tag and video games and the kids love it.  Now when the day arrived, I was feeling a little sick and I didn't want to go.  When I told the kids, my daughter said, "But Dad, you gave your word."  I had a choice to make.  I could either go back on my word and do something else or I could go and feel a little sick in the process.  Let me just say that while I didn't feel good, I wasn't completely sick or I would have stayed home.  I'm not suggesting that you shouldn't be smart and weigh the consequences of the situation.  But in this case, I should have taken the kids and we ultimately did.

Let me turn this blog in a slightly different direction and I will get to my point for today.  Many of us say that we are Christians but unfortunately our actions don't line up very well with our words.  I heard a story and whether or not it is true, it illustrates a good point.  A pastor of a church had a friend who ran a restaurant close to the church.  One day he and his friend were talking and the restaurant owner said to the pastor, "You know I have a lot of trouble getting people to work on Sunday."

"Why is that?" the pastor asked.

"Because the people from your church are the worst tippers and treat the wait staff rudely," he said.

I can't tell you how many times I have heard of Christians that I would never want to do business with because of the lack of integrity that I have seen.

So here is the real point.  The bible says in John 3:16, "For God so loved the world that He gave...."  If we are going to say that we are Christians, it's high time we started giving.  When we go to a place to eat, the waiters ought to fight with each other to see who gets our table because we are such generous people.  When is the last time you gave to someone without expecting anything in return?  I hope the answer is recently.  But if not, it's time to make a change.  Remember God gives to us every day and he does it because he loves us.  If we are telling people that we are Christians, isn't it high time our actions lined up with our words?

That's another Opinion of the Minion

Conflict

Today I want to talk about something that is a very tough subject and honestly I don't know if I have ever seen people do this right.  I want to talk about how we solve problems between people.  Now I don't think that we can really go around solving other people's problems.  I know several people who have tried unsuccessfully to do that for years.  But what I want to talk about today is a great personal triumph for me.

Think with me for a minute about learning how to drive a car.  If you had never done that before and had never even seen a car, do you think you would be capable of driving one?  Let's say you managed to get the car started and drive it.  Since you don't know the traffic laws, there is a very good chance that you will wreck that car and quite possibly get someone else hurt right?  Well that's the way I think I have been with conflict resolution for most of my life.

If you are married or in a serious relationship, you are going to have conflict between the two people in the relationship.  If you aren't, you are going to have conflict between yourself and your friends and all sorts of other people.  Now for me, resolving conflict with friends has always been fairly easy but for years I have had conflicts with people who are close to me and had no idea how to resolve it correctly.  As I have said before, for a long time I simply turned my emotions off.  That wasn't the best thing but it made conflict resolution easy.  How?  Well, most of the time I would other people simply run over me. Whenever there was a conflict I was normally the one to try to keep the peace.  I read in the bible that blessed are the peacemakers and I tried to be a peacemaker.  The problem was, many of the people I knew only wanted peace on their terms.

That typically didn't work out well for me because I just gave in.  Was there really conflict resolution?  No because I just bottled up all the hurt and never found a balanced, healthy way to resolve it.  Part of my problem was having to deal with people who didn't know how to resolve it either.  Most of them learned that the way to resolve conflict was to get mad and yell.  If you show enough anger then the other side will back down and the conflict is resolved right?  In the short term, that is true but it is very damaging to a relationship.  So that way doesn't work either.

About a year and a half ago, the Lord really opened my eyes to my emotions and how they work.  Since then, I have felt a lot of things.  Most of them are new.  Many feel good but many do not.  This brought a change in the way I decided to resolve things.  If I didn't get a good solution to the problem and one that was more on my terms then I would simply cut the offending person out of my life.  I applied this to dating and I can tell you it didn't really work either.  What I was saying then was unless you are perfect, I won't be around you because if you mess up once, you must be like the other people I have dealt with who don't know how to do this any better than I do.  Guess what, that isn't a winning strategy either.

So why am I so excited?  Well I recently dealt with a person over a particular issue.  On the issue in question, the other person did something that aggravated me a little.  Now fortunately, I read a book earlier that day discussing conflicts and how we resolve them.  Some people believe that how you resolve conflict will indicate how long you stay in relationship with someone.  If you don't do it well, that relationship won't last.  Well in this particular case, I ran a quick errand to give myself a little breathing room to think through things a little.  When I did, here is what I discovered.  This issue did irritate me and it would be unhealthy for me ignore the emotion.  However, in the grand scheme of life, it really wasn't that big a deal.

The other person in this situation could sense that I was offended and thus became a little defensive.  I was able to share how I felt.  It didn't take long and as soon as I shared my feelings and knew the other person generally cared about how I felt, all of my aggravation over the situation left.  I felt much better.  At the end of the discussion this person felt better too.  The funny part is that I don't know if the other person has had much success in life resolving personal conflict either because I sensed this person was waiting for me to attack.  When I didn't it seemed like it was a little shocking to that person as well.  Did it feel great?  Yes!  I finally let something bother me, expressed my emotions in a calm and respectful manner and then the situation was resolved.

So what did I learn?  When you have a problem with someone, you need to acknowledge that their is a problem.  Don't stuff it down but don't react out of anger either.  Take a few minutes to cool off and get your head under control.  After that, take the time to express yourself in a respectful way to the other person.  After that, you will feel better.  Now let me also say that it certainly helped that I knew the other person loved and cared about me.  This particular person is also very level headed and very capable of rationally discussing the situation which was a big plus.

That's another Opinion of the Minion

Politics

OK, this post might bring some criticism but here goes.  Today I want to talk about politics.  Since we have major elections in the United States in about 5 weeks, I guess it only seems appropriate.

First of all, let me say to all the yellow dog Democrats and all the yellow dog Republicans, "Wake UP!"  For those of you who don't know, a yellow dog Democrat or Republican would vote for a yellow dog for office as long as it ran for their party.  It seems like I see constant arguments from people on Facebook favoring Romney or Obama for president and most of the time, they quote someone else who said something designed to scare you into voting for their candidate.  They say things like Obama is a socialist Muslim.  When they mention Muslim, they want to scare you because we know it was Muslim extremists that attack America and her allies.  The thought behind this logic is that Obama is working to give the country to Muslims.

Additionally, since he is a Socialist, he is trying to turn our country into the new USSR.

On the other side, since Romney made a lot of money on Wall Street, he is going to ruin our country with all his excess spending.  He is only out to take care of the rich and since greed begets greed, he will be responsible for creating a system where only the rich people make more money and they control everything while the poor people suffer all on his own. 

The first problem I have with all the people saying all these things is that none of them have first hand evidence of what either of these people really want.  All they have is second hand accounts of what someone thinks someone else heard from the janitor of some one's hotel.  I think all this fear mongering is terrible. 

Now let me give you my political views.  On Obamacare - I think it's a bad idea.  It will force people who can't afford to buy health care to pay a penalty or by insurance.  That's just plain ignorance gone to seed.  It will also force Americans who have been very successful to pay for those who have not.  This is called socialism and it's wrong.  When we start taking money from the rich and giving it to the poor, that's called theft.  Sorry if this makes you mad but it's just the truth.  The government doesn't have a right to take money from one group and give it to another.  Right all you republicans?

But I am not saying that we shouldn't give to people who need it because we should.  I give to people who need it a lot and I believe very strongly in giving to others.  I just don't believe that anyone should be forced to give to others.

On capitalism - I believe capitalism is a good thing.  But unchecked capitalism is a terrible thing.  Unchecked, unregulated capitalism is what led to the housing problem that crashed our economy a few years ago.  So guess what, we need government and we need it to police the businesses of this country who so greatly effect our nation.  Sorry Republicans, that's simply the truth.

On homosexuality - See my post of a couple of days ago.  But let me add this, if the government should give money to homosexuals for gay pride parades, etc., then it should give an equal amount of money to those who want to take the opposite stance.  My personal opinion is that government should not give any money to either side for these purposes.  But let me say this to both sides, each of you will have to answer for your own stuff when you get to heaven.  Now learn to start respecting the fact that people might have a different opinion than you.  Quit arguing as you will not convince the other side that you are right and start loving.  That's what God commanded us to do!  Sorry both sides, its just the truth.

Let me send this one out to all the Christians who read my blog.  While this may be shocking and may require great faith from the Republicans, it is entirely possible to be a Democrat and be a Christian.  Nowhere in the bible does God mention political affiliation as a prerequisite to going to Heaven.  I think he discussed something about Jesus as the savior not Barak Obama or George Bush.  But here's what I really want you to know.  The bible says we need to pray for our leaders.  It doesn't say pray only pray for the ones you voted for.  So as we go into a time of decision for this great nation, I want to ask each of you to pray about how you should vote and pray for our elected officials that they will govern in a godly manner regardless of what their political affiliation.

That's another Opinion of the Minion

The Box

Hello everyone,

Today I reposted what I believe to be the most significant thing I have ever said.  The post is called, the Box.  Recently my girlfriend and I were discussing homosexuality and I will not discuss whether it is right or wrong.  You have a bible, find out for yourself.  But I do want to stress that hate for people of that lifestyle is totally wrong.  See our job isn't to judge it's to love.  If you look at thing's through the lense of the Box, it will change the way you look at people.  So, here's the Box.




I have given this a lot a of thought and I believe that the Lord showed me something that changed the way I view people.

You see, when God creates a person he gives them abilities, passions, desires, talents and all sorts of wonderful attributes that we seldom ever see. Then he takes all these things and puts them in a box with silver wrapping paper and very pretty red ribbon tied in a bow around it. He calls the box - You. It is a present to the world. When I saw this for the first time, I looked around at all the people walking by and said to myself, "Merry Christmas!" because all I could see were beautiful boxes waiting to be opened.

The problem is many people don't even know what is in their own box much less have taken the time to look in someone elses box. This starts when we are in school. As we grow up, we learn all kinds of new things about ourselves: what we like, what we don't, the changes that our bodies go through, we learn things in school about the world and we learn about social interaction. But sometimes that social interaction teaches us that the stuff in our box isn't all that important.

Have you ever felt like the stuff inside you doesn't really matter? Can you look back to a point in your life where you were doing something you really enjoyed and someone else called it or you stupid or worthless?

When you pull the most precious parts of your life out of the box and let other people see them, it is scary because you are definitely vulnerable at that point. But know this, the Lord put all those wonderful things inside and they are of great price and value. Don't let someone cheapen what is so precious by their comments.

Everyday, I see people who are alive but aren't living. I think it is because they have told themselves that the treasures in their box aren't important or worth much so they don't do anything with them. They may not have done this openly but below the surface it happens. You have to know that if God took the time to create you and put all those treasures inside you, they are important both to him and to me.

When was the last time you looked in your box and pulled out something you truly enjoyed and used it? When was the last time you opened the box? When was the last time you were passionate about anything? Are you so caught up in the rat race that your box isn't important any more?

Here is another interesting question - When was the last time you opened up someone else's box to see who they really are and celebrate the gifts inside them? Do you always know what is wrong with your husband, wife, girlfriend, boyfriend, kids, friends, parents, family, coworkers but never look inside the box for what is so awesome about them?

Husbands, what would happen if instead of criticizing your wife, the next time you saw her, you decided to look at something that was so precious to her, so beautiful, so tender, so amazing and something she loved about herself? What would happen if you nurtured that gift and encouraged it to grow? What would happen if, after you opened her box, she decided that your box was the most special one on earth and decided to touch the core of who you are? What if you both decided to go deep in your relationship?

Boyfriends, what if you looked at her and decided that you wanted more than just what was inside her clothes, you wanted what was inside her heart. Girlfriends, what if you decided that you wanted the same thing? What if you wanted to explore who they are and make them the best person they could be while they did the same thing to you? What if you looked at them and asked, "What can I give?" instead of "What can I get?"

Is this a little intense? Yes. Is it worth it if just one person decides to open their box or open someone elses? Yes. You see, I believe that I got to see a little glimpse of the creation through the creator's eyes when He showed me this. It was truly an eye opening experience and I can definitely say I will never be the same. I got to see how He looked at and longs for His creation to be all that we can be and how His love for us goes so deep His heart aches for us.

So I guess the real question is what is in your box? I want to know.

That's the Opinion of His Minion

Viva Las Vegas

Hi All,

Most of my posts have a message or some point that I try to illustrate.  And generally, I tell a story about something that happened in my life and what I learned from it.

Well today's lesson is going to be a little different.  I want to take a minute to talk about being grateful and thankful.  As I was sitting last night talking with my beautiful girlfriend, D, she said that she never wanted to take me for granted.  It was so sweet and beautiful and I said the same thing.  I am amazed at how quickly I can get used to things.

See when we first started dating, she would tell me sweet things like how nice a guy I was or how amazing I was and thanked me for something almost everyday.  Those sweet comments always touched my heart.  I noticed recently that I was not thankful in the same way.  Those comments use to make me blush and embarrass me a little even though they were always just between us.  She still makes those statements to me almost every day and she is such a blessing in my life.  We both have a deep appreciation for each other as well as a love that continues to deepen. 

So what does all this have to do with Las Vegas?  Well, I found another reason to be thankful.  This past week, I was in Las Vegas for a trade show for my company.  But I noticed that something was off when I got there.  I wasn't depressed or anything.  I just wasn't excited about being there.  I have been to Las Vegas at least 20 times in my career so I have seen a lot of the city.  In times past I always got excited about going out there even though I am not a big gambler, drinker or womanizer.  At first I thought I was just experiencing burn out on the city.

The morning after I got there, D sent me a text telling me to flee temptation from "sin" city.  Now she was just kidding and I know she trusted that I wouldn't do anything wrong and it was just a little funny quip between us and I love that about her.  My response to her was that I didn't need to resist temptation from sin city because the person I wanted to be with was back in Fort Worth (her).  This was why I was a little off when I got there.  For the first time in a long time, I wasn't running away from Fort Worth to get a break from my problems (we all have them right).  Now I love my children and I love being around them but for many years I was a very lonely guy.  I was around people and married but lonely at the same time.

But this trip to Las Vegas made me understand how much I genuinely love that woman and I was looking forward to getting home to be with her.  So let me say - Thank you D, for making my life so much fun and for loving me the way you do.  You are the most remarkable woman I have ever met and I am so grateful that you are in my life.  Life is definitely better with you in it!

So is there a moral to my post today?  Well I didn't think I had one until now.  What am I telling all of us today?  BE THANKFUL!  Yes, I know that we all face hard times but try to find something to be thankful for today.  I will cheer you up.

That's another Opinion of the Minion

What Were You Thinking?

OK, today I want to talk about something that is extremely important - thoughts.  I want to share something that has recently come to light in my life.  My thoughts will dictate where I go for the day. 

Now I have heard people talk about this a lot and the bible even says that we are supposed to cast out bad thoughts but I never really got it until recently.  Now I have tried unsuccessfully to get rid of those bad thoughts for years and for years I thought I wasn't spiritual enough or something because it never worked.  See a bad thought would get in my head and I would start trying to get rid of it but it wouldn't work.

But here's what I recently discovered about those thoughts.  They had a very direct effect on my mood and feelings.  I once had someone tell me that I needed to lead my heart (my emotions) and I can definitely see his point.  Now I am not saying that your emotions are not important or that you shouldn't listen to what you are feeling because that's not true.  But I do want to spend a couple of minutes talking about how your thoughts effect them.

See, if you concentrate on something long enough, it will definitely effect the way you feel.  What's worse is if you meditate on something bad, many times your thoughts will run wild.  You can end up dreading or mentally walking through all kinds of situations that never will actually happen.  Have you ever gotten a piece of bad news and not been in a place where you could do something about it instantly?  When that happens to me, I can get really worked up over nothing. 

I remember just recently I was feeling like things were off.  Now as you may know, dealing with my emotions is a relatively new thing for me as I have only been doing this for a couple of years.  So as I sat there trying to figure out why I was feeling like I was in a funk, I did a mental inventory.  My relationship with my kids was very good.  I was getting them the help they needed.  I was seeing good things happening in my business.  It was growing and I had made several very positive changes that were showing great results on a business that was doing well before we made them.  I was (and still am) dating a great woman.  She is the most amazing person.  I know she loves me deeply because she tells and shows me and I love her very deeply too.

So as I sat there trying to figure out why the funk, I noticed that I felt like something was wrong and it made me feel a little strange.  But when I did a mental inventory, everything was going (and still is) great.  So what was going on?   Here is what I discovered.  When I went to bed at night, if I wasn't careful, I my mind would wander all over the place and most of the time, I was running bad scenarios through my head.  I didn't mean to do this but I didn't stop it from happening either.  Now I know life is full of things that happen that are bad.   The bible even says that we will have trouble.  I also believe that we should plan for certain contingencies in our lives.  That's a smart thing to do.  But I was planning on all kinds of stupid contingencies.  As I planned through each one that was bad, I realized that it had a negative effect on my emotions and thus a negative effect on my mood.

But there is good news!  I figured out how to cast down the thoughts and it was really simple.  You don't make them go away and keep your mind blank.  You fill your mind with good thoughts.  What if I started planning for the good things that God has in store for me?  What if I started thinking about how He wants to bless me and how He has the power to do so?  What if I looked back at some of the sweet texts that my beautiful girlfriend sends me and think about how much she loves me and I love her?  What if I start thinking about all the good things going on at work or with my kids?  I noticed that when I do this, my emotions are good and my spirit lifts.

So what am I telling you?  When you feel your emotions are in a bad place, check yourself.  If there are good reasons for your negative emotions, then don't deny them - deal with them.  But I think you will find that many times we get upset for no good reason.  When that happens make the conscious decision to meditate on good things and not bad ones.

That's another Opinion of the Minion.

Are You Drunk?

Hello everyone,

Today I want to tell you about something I really saw in a different light this week.  But before I get to that, I want to roll the clock back several years and tell you a little story.

When I first started working for company I run today, some of the people from our company had to take a trip to Detroit.  Now I was very new to flying and so I was really excited.  But the truth be told, I was new to almost everything related to business.  I was still a wet behind the ears rookie at our business at it showed.

There were four of us on this particular trip.  We were going to see a company that wanted us to work for them and this was our interview process.  It was a chance for us to interview them and vice versa.  But since we were coming to Detroit on our air fare, they paid for our hotel rooms (remember this fact, you will see it again).  My boss was normally in a good mood when we went on these trips and he needed it for this trip.  As we got to the counter, I was the first one in our line.  Now my boss was in the frequent flier program and he had the ability to upgrade to first class from coach.  The attendant asked if I wanted to upgrade since I was in my bosses party and I said, "Sure! Updgrade the whole group!"  Because I wasn't using my money, being a big spender was no problem.  The funny part was that I didn't know it cost money to do the upgrades.  I thought my boss got to do this just because he had flown so much on that airline.  Well $500 later we got on the airplane in first class.  If he was mad about it, he never mentioned it.  Truth be told, he would probably have done it himself.

So he and another of the more seasoned veterans of our company sat a couple of rows behind us while I and another wet behind the ears salesman sat in the bulkhead row.  It was an evening flight and we all had a good time.  In fact, my companion had a very good time.  He drank a bottle of wine during the flight.  Well we are about to start our decent into Detroit when the flight attendant asks him if he wants to take this other bottle with him when we get off the plane.  When my friend finds out he has 30 minutes until we land, he promptly orders the bottle opened and finishes it before we hit the runway in Detroit.

At this point, he is finished himself.  See two bottles of wine over the course of three hours is a lot of wine even for him.  At that point, he could hold his liquor pretty well.  What he didn't factor into the equation was the altitude and how it makes the alcohol even more potent.  While we were standing in line to get our rental car, he has his arm around the guy behind.  This other guy is wearing the ugliest suit I have ever seen.  It is bright yellow and he is wearing a bright yellow hat like the guy from Curious George.  Being the salesman he is, my friend is trying to convince this stranger to come charter a boat the company owed!  He was totally plastered!

So we get to the hotel and start the check in process.  In case you have never stayed at a hotel, this is a typical check in process.  You walk up to the counter, announce who you are and they start the process.  At this point, the people behind the counter ask for your credit card to pay for the room and any other incidental charges.  Unless someone else has already paid for your room!  At one point in our process and I find my friend in a full on argument about paying for his room.  Now he is attempting to pay for it with his driver's license (not a credit card).  When the lady behind the counter explains that the rooms have been paid for by the company we are visiting, he gets upset because he thinks that this little lady is saying he is in capable of handling his financial responsibilities and tries to pay for his room with his YMCA card.  This whole process goes on for a while before we get him convinced that the room is paid for and he is in right standing with the hotel.

That's sort of a funny story right.  Well what would you say if I told you that you have probably done the same thing in your life?  I can already hear people saying, "Not me!  I've never been drunk!" or something else explaining my ridiculous question.  But hold on there for a minute.

See, I bet there is an area of your life where this is a problem.  Have you ever done something wrong in your life and then regretted it?  Have you ever felt bad about something you did and sort of punished yourself for doing it?  I'm pretty sure you have.  But you see, your forgiveness has already been paid in full.  Jesus did it once and for all.  He took care of your hotel bill for good.  I think we go around a lot trying to pay for our own sins with our driver's license or YMCA card when Jesus has already taken care of it.  So if that's you today, quit trying to pay for something that's already paid with something that wouldn't take care of the bill if there was one.  Just accept God's forgiveness.  When you do something wrong, admit it, quit it and forget it!

That's another Opinion of the Minion.

Feelings

Hello everyone.  Today I want to write an opinion on something I know very little about.  So read at your own risk!

Today I want to talk about feelings.  This has been a hard area of my life to deal with.  For years, I didn't want to feel anything because feelings brought with them a lot of hurt and not much joy.  Now I am a business man so I definitely look at things in terms of return on investment and to me, if I let my feelings out then the bad ones definitely outweighed the good ones so why bother.

But then about 18 months ago, through reading a book that a friend of mine asked me to read, all those bottled up feelings came out after 30+ years of holding most of them in.  Let me tell you it was an experience.  I cried for a long time.  Then I just hurt.  Then I was so overcome with emotions that I freaked out a friend of mine by asking her out.  It was quite a mess and I realized now that I liked part of it but I really didn't like another part of it.

I liked feeling things because I finally felt alive.  Yes, it is possible to go through life feeling down and depressed and still be successful on the outside.  I did that and there were times when I had some feeling but I kept them as muted as I possibly could.  Why, because the ups didn't justify the downs.  But I did like all those feelings because at least I was alive. 

Now I have heard people say that we can't trust our feelings and that was easy for me for years because I suppressed all of them I could suppress.  But that statement is actually the point of my writing today.  I finally realized that while I enjoy all these new feelings, I can't rely on my feelings alone to make decisions about my life.  That is probably a "duh" statement for most of you but for me it is a revelation.

There are times in our lives when we want something so bad on the inside that we will do almost anything to get it.  Have you ever wanted to go out with a girl or do something so that she will notice you?  I have.  As a matter of fact, let me tell you a funny story from my time at TCU.

See during my senior year, I had a girlfriend, A.  Now A was a very nice person and I wasn't.  I was very selfish and only wanted what was good for me without really giving any thought to what was good for her.  Eventually, she figured this out and decided it was time to move on.  But since I had never really had a serious girlfriend and wanted to keep one (I wasn't in love with her but I was in love with the idea of being in love.) I decided that I was going to do anything to get her back.

So one night, I went over to her dorm and called her.  A friend of hers was there and they came down to check me out.  I made up some stupid story of being hit in the head and faked a concussion.  Or at least I did my best to fake one.  I have never had one and didn't really know the symptoms of one at the time so I gave it my best guess.  Why?  For sympathy of course.  I guess I hoped that she would take me back.  Well ultimately she took me to my parent's house.  Now my dad who used to be an ambulance driver took one look at me and knew I was faking it.  Needless to say, I didn't get the girl back.

Why did I do such a stupid thing?  My emotions told me to.  Now just today, I realized while having emotions is great, I can't allow myself to be ruled by them

That's another Opinion of the Minion

Ask the Minion

Hello Everyone.

Last week, I asked you to post your questions on Facebook and I told you I would do my best to answer them.  Before I get to the questions, let me give you a couple of things.  First of all, I am not associated with the movie, Despicable Me so any questions regarding those minions, I will decline to answer.  Second, please remember that when I write these posts, they are just my opinions and what I believe the Lord shows me.  I do not have any type of degree or certification counseling so if you have a serious problem, please seek professional help as I don't want to lead you astray.

OK, let's get to the questions.

1.  MB - How do I get a guy like you?  Let me start by saying how flattered I am at the question.  While this may sound like false humility, I really don't consider myself all that special but I am a good guy.  So how do you get a good guy (someone better than me, I hope)?  My first thought is that you have to find one.  So when you are around boys or girls, ask yourself how they make you feel and why?  Are they good to you and do they treat you right?  Do they always strive to do the right thing (even if they aren't perfect)?  Do they make you feel special and are you compatible?  Is there any real attraction between the two of you?  If the answer to these questions is yes then you have found someone.

Now here's the hard part - How do you get them to like you?  The answer is - you can't.  Just be yourself, if they like you for you then great.  If not, then they really aren't the person for you.  If you have to change yourself to be someone else for them to like you, eventually you will go back to being your real self and then you have a problem or you will change so much that you won't like yourself.  So just be you.  Be bold enough to go say hello to them and talk to them and then see what happens.  MB, if you have more questions, please don't hesitate to ask and I will try to answer.

MP - What is the meaning of life?  According to Webster's dictionary one meaning is - the condition that distinguishes organisms from inorganic objects and dead organisms, being manifested by growth through metabolism, reproduction, and the power of adaptation to environment through changes originating internally.  If you mean philosophically, I really don't know.

TTS - Why is life so confusing when it gets hard?  There are a lot of reason for that but I think one thing that happens to me is when life gets hard my emotions tell me one thing and my head tells me something else.  When that happens, sometimes my heart is right, sometimes my head is right.  The only thing I can tell you is to take your decisions to God.  When you get peace from Him about the right decision, then go with it.  I will probably try to expand on this in another post.

JAE & AA - What's your favorite food? - That is a hard question and the answer changes based on the mood I am in at the time.  I like almost all kinds of food.  Over the course of my life, my absolute favorite has probably been pizza.

KL - Why does God allow awful things like abuse, especially child and domestic to occur? The Lord is supposed to be this all-knowing, all-loving, kind, caring God. Yet He lets his children suffer?  KL, I have struggled with this question for many years.  I mean, why did God let the serpent take the blessing in the garden of Eden anyway?  Part of the answer is that we are free will beings and we can choose what we do.  Thing about this - If you could make someone love you and you knew that the only reason they loved you is because you made them, would you make them love you?  I wouldn't because it wouldn't be real love.  I believe that God set a system in place and he expected us to follow that system.  As adults when we don't then there is the risk that we will get hurt.  Now let me say, I can feel pain from thinking about child abuse and I don't know why this happens.  It is so awful and so wrong.  I believe that God's hands are tied in certain places and sometimes he can't interfere but I really don't know why.  Now I can hear some of you saying that God is all powerful and he can do anything.  If that's the case, why did Jesus have to come die for my sins?  KL, I don't feel like I did a good job of answering this question but I hope this helps some.

PC - Who is better - Batman or Superman? - In my book, Superman is better.  Why because he always stood for truth, justice and the American way plus he could fly and was super strong.

FB

That's another Opinion of the Minion

Leadership

Today I want to talk about leadership. 

The thing that really annoys me about this topic is I hear people talk about how to be a leader all the time.  As a matter of fact, four or five years ago, that was the "in" thing to talk about.  People wrote books about it, gave classes about it and in general told you everything you needed to know to become one.

But I really struggled watching people who were leaders that didn't have any people following them.  I saw several people who could tell you what to do and what not to do.  They were "in the know" about all sorts of topics.  In fact, if you needed help with a situation, just bring it up around them and they wouldn't even wait for you to ask, they would just "lead" you out with a lot of advice you didn't request.  Have you ever met people like that?

Well now I want to take a swing at how to be a leader.  Let's start with a good definition.  As I was working out this morning, I was reading a book by Dick Marcinko.  Dick was the leader of a group of Navy Seals in the 1980s and he has written several books about his team.  Now these books are not about his actual team, they are fiction and I would classify them as mental candy.  I don't know that the really expand my mind from reading them.  In the book I am reading now, Mr. Marcinko gave the perfect definition of leadership in two words - follow me.

See I think that is what real leadership is all about.  I am learning as I continue to grow in the places where the Lord put me in a leadership role that this is the crux of how to lead.  In my particular position, I tried to just let things evolve on their own and I basically just sat back and watched a lot of things grow on their own.  I was fortunate that the Lord blessed the work and it did grow but now I understand that I need to lead from the front and provide the vision. 

When I think of leadership, I think of two of my closest friends JC and BL.  They both embody the principal that I am discussing today.  Now let me tell you a couple of things that I learned from both of them while I was at TCU.  First of all, while I was learning these principals from them, I didn't always like them.  They were demanding and they were normally not very tactful in the way they approached getting us to follow them.  But I would have done anything either of them asked because of the way they led. 

See, I followed them.  Why because they were doing what they wanted me to do and they were doing it to such a high level that they did it better than everyone else.  Their challenge was always come up here where I already am and let's get better together.  See, if I wanted their leadership, I only needed to look in front of me because that's where they were.

These two guys embodied what Dick Marcinko said - follow me.  So what am I trying to say today?  If you want people to follow you just start doing what you want people to do.  Quit trying to tell everyone else how they should do something and just live your life as an example of how it should be done.  That's true leadership.

That's Another Opinion of the Minion.

Stealing from The Minion

Hello everyone.  Today I want to tell you about something that happened to me this week.  On Tuesday, my wonderful girlfriend and I went to eat dinner at a local Mexican food restaurant here in Fort Worth.  While we were in the restaurant eating, someone broke the glass out of my vehicle and stole my iPhone.  That's pretty mean right?  Well in the process there was some additional body work that needed to be done and it's in the shop.

I bet some of you are already a little mad at the person who did this right?  I was for a short time.  This brings me to what I want to discuss today.  Today's blog is about forgiveness.

I know of a person who holds grudges extremely well.  This person is not into forgiveness.   As a matter of fact, this person can bring up injustices whether real or perceived from thirty years ago and relive them just like they were yesterday.  Now this person, who I will call person A has held a grudge against person B for at least 40 years and when A brings up events that caused the hurt over 4 decades ago, it's as if it happened last week.  You can see A's blood pressure go up and A's face turn red.  You can see the tension in A's body and all the stress.

B, on the other hand is just living life without one care about all that stuff.  I can tell you that B hardly ever brings any of it up.  I learned a lesson from watching this.  Who was really hurt all these years by the events of forty years ago?  The answer is A.  A has been damaged for not forgiving.  Now the bible says that God can't forgive us if we can't forgive other people so we must learn to forgive.  But aside from that extremely important fact, it's important for us to forgive others who have done us wrong because it frees us from the damaging effects of holding things against them.

I know this can be very hard.  I was in a relationship once with someone who did something that they shouldn't have done and this hurt me deeply because it betrayed a basic trust that I had with that person (I don't think the person I am talking about reads this blog, so if you are my friend and reading this it's probably not you).  I could have held a grudge and I could have worn that wrong suffered like a coat full of spikes on the inside lining but the only person who would have gotten hurt was me.  The other person never even asked my forgiveness.  But I decided to give the people involved forgiveness because I didnt' want the hurt.

Now this is exactly what I did after the incident with my phone.  After about thirty minutes, I cooled off and started thanking God that no one got hurt, I got to spend an great evening eating with someone I love, and at the end of the day everything was going to be OK.  After I got done with the thankfulness part, I purposely, from my heart, forgave whoever stole my phone.  Do you know what happened?  It set me free from the weight of unforgiveness.

So let me encourage you right now.  If you are holding on to something that someone has done to you, forgive them and let it go because unforgiveness only hurts you.

And that's another Opinion of the Minion.

Be Where You Are

Today I want to talk about being where you are.  That sounds pretty redundant right?  Well the Lord really began to deal with me about this subject a few weeks ago.  As you all know I have this amazing woman in my life, D.  I love her a lot.  She's the right type of person for me because she's different than me in so many ways and I have learned so much from her.  We have had many conversations about this topic but she really brought it home to me a couple of weeks ago.  It was just a passing comment but sometimes the Lord will use those types of comments to speak to you and this was one of those times.

She is a first grade teacher.  Now I believe that God anoints preachers to preach but from what I have seen, I think teachers need more anointing than most preachers.  One day we were talking about school and she said it was a very demanding job because with twenty kids who are only six years old, she has to stay very focused on what is going on around her.  She said that is something she works on in her life - giving whatever you are doing 100% of your energy while you are doing it.  That was very interesting on a couple of levels. 

First of all, it gave me more insight into her as a person and I really enjoy getting to know her.  But it also made me examine my own behavior.  It made me ask the question - Am I giving what I am doing my full attention?

Now I have seen this picture for a long time in a different area of my life.  When I was married, I was not happy so I was always looking forward to the next thing.  I tried to look forward to going to play golf because playing golf was fun and it helped me cope with the unpleasant things going on around me.  It was sort of my way to escape from the real world.  But here's what I noticed.  When I got to the golf course, I would play a few holes and then I started looking forward to going out to dinner or the movies or something after our round of golf.  More importantly, I quit enjoying the round of golf and found my only enjoyment coming from looking forward to the next thing.

I lived that way for a long time.  So when I was with my friends, I was only partially with my friends because the other part of me was on to the next thing on my agenda.  That wasn't fair to anyone.  It certainly wasn't fair to my friends who were hanging out with me because they were giving me their full attention (at least as far as I could tell) but I wasn't doing the same thing.  But it also wasn't fair to me.  The people around me are all gifts from God and I wasn't enjoying the gifts that God put into my life.

Which brings me to another point.  I wasn't being fair to God.  He was placing all these great people and opportunities in front of me and I didn't enjoy them.  To make matters worse, I didn't appreciate them like I should so I didn't value them as high as I should.  That's terrible.  Now the reverse of this can also be true.  You can be so focused on some negative situation that it causes you to act the same way.

Now fast forward to the present.  While I don't really look forward like that anymore, there is another place that is just as bad.  I can be not totally present for no apparent reason.  A person that I work with brought that up to me yesterday.  He mentioned a specific incident where I was disconnected from a situation that I should have really paid attention.  A person needed me to be caring and considerate and I was mentally absent.  That is horrible and I have no excuse for my actions.  But it is something that I want to watch.

So what am I saying today?  Wherever you are, be there completely!  Thank you D for reminding me of this very important issue.  I love you.

That's another Opinion of the Minion 

Heart

Today I want to talk about heart.  When I was in high school, I was on the football team.  Notice I did not say I was a football player because I really wasn't but I was on the team.  Now we had a coach named coach S.  He coached the defense when I was in school and he was meaner than a junkyard dog.  Now I don't know if he is the first person I ever heard say this but I can see him saying it in my mind.  I can see him saying, "It's not the size of the dog in the fight, it's the size of the fight in the dog."


Before I get into this, I am NOT advocating dog fighting and that is NOT the point of that saying.  What it means is that sometimes you don't look at what a person looks like on the outside, you look at their insides.  Many times a football team can win a game against a better team just because they wanted to win more than the other team.  Because their hearts are consumed with winning and it grows to such large proportions inside, it comes out and they can win.

Not that many years ago, I was running 5K and 10K races and I was placing very well in my age group.  I even won a couple of times.  Now I am only 5' 7" tall and have short legs.  I was running against guys who had longer legs and had more of a runner's body.  Why could I beat them - heart.  I was determined that no one was going to work harder than me.  I wanted to be the best runner that I could be.  Interestingly enough, I never felt like I was in competition with anyone but myself.  I didn't see a guy who I thought was in my age group and try to out run him.  I just tried to do my personal best every race.  That attitude helped me to do very well.

So why am I writing this today?  Because I have seen several people who have given up on their dreams and their goals.  While I was on a recent trip to Seattle, I watched some kids playing hide and go seek in a park.  This one kid was taller and had longer legs that most of the other kids playing.  There were even some really young kids that he certainly could have out ran and tagged before they got to base but he convinced himself that he could not catch anyone and the first round, he didn't.  Why?  Heart. 

He didn't have the heart to run.  Is it really necessary to have a lot of heart and win one for the Gypper while playing hide and go seek?  Of course not.  At the end of the day, who won or lost at hide and go seek is totally irrelevant.  But let's look at a couple of other scenarios that are a little different.

Many of you know that I am a lawyer by training although I don't practice. It was the last semester of my final year of law school and my brother told me, "Don't quit.  You are almost there."  At that point, I was in the top part of my class and doing great.  Quitting had never entered my mind.  But what if it had?  Where would I be if I didn't have the heart to finish?  I wouldn't have a degree.  Some of you may be considering dropping out of high school.  DON'T QUIT.  You can make it.  Some of you may be considering quitting something else like a job or a relationship or something else.  DON'T QUIT.  You can see this through.  Remember this - Tough times don't last.  Tough people do.

So I will leave this where I started.  It's not the size of the dog in the fight, it's the size of the fight in the dog.  You may be going through something bigger than you.  Remember that the you on the inside is much bigger that the you on the outside especially if God is on the inside you are bigger than the problem you face.

I've done it again.  I blogged myself happy.  That's another Opinion of the Minion.

GIGO

Hello everyone,

Today I want to talk about something I relearned just recently.  It's the concept of GIGO.  "What does that mean," you ask.  It stands for Garbage In Garbage Out.

Let's think about computers for a minute.  We all know that two plus two equals four right.  Well what would happen if we programmed a computer to say that two plus two equals five?  If we did that, every time we asked the computer how much two plus two equals, it would tell us five.  And it would be wrong every time.  So what happened?  We put the wrong stuff in the computer and it gave us the wrong answer.  Guess what, it will consistently give us the wrong answer until we take the time to reprogram it.

So what did I relearn about this and why?  Well as you know, I normally talk about life and how to live it better.  I try to be very positive and upbeat about everything and most of the time I am.  Do you know why?  Because I try to feed on upbeat and positive stuff.  Now I'm not saying for one minute that I am perfect at it but as a rule, I don't allow my mind to feed on things that aren't edifying.

Now I can already hear some of you saying, "Well you must live in a dream world.  I bet your one of those people who can't see the bad stuff that is happening right in front of your face!"  Not so - I absolutely recognize that there is bad stuff going on around us.  But if I can't do anything about it, then I really don't want to hear much about it.  I stay informed about the issues to some extent but there have been more than one "crisis" that I completely missed out on because I didn't know it was happening.

Let me tell you one place I try to avoid - the evening news.  Do you know why?  Because it normally goes something like this: three stories about bad things happening to people locally, commercial, one more bad story, the weather, commercial, sports and then it's over.  What a waste.  I would pay money to see a news guy come on the TV and say, "Tonight folks, we really don't have anything news worthy to report so here is the weather (if you live in Texas in August, that's not necessary - we all know it's hot!) and the sports.  Now we are going to skip to Wheel of Fortune twenty minutes early."  Am I saying that you shouldn't watch the news?  Certainly not.  What I am telling you is to spend quality time focusing on good things in your life.

Let me tell you another example.  I have always had a can do attitude for the most part.  I believe that I can accomplish almost anything I set my mind to do.  For the most part, I have seen that come to pass in my life.  So answer this question - What do you say/think about yourself?  Do you say that you can't do it or that you are just too stupid?  The chances are you won't accomplish what you want because you are feeding yourself a lie and telling yourself you can't.  Here's the funny thing about a lie - If you say it long enough, you will start to believe it.  When that happens, you are in serious trouble.  Yet, on the positive side, when you confess that you can do it, you might not believe it at first but keep at it.  If you continue to feed your mind with the positive stuff, eventually it will come to pass.

I remember when I was 350 pounds.  I weighed that for several years.  Then one day, I started saying that I weighed 205 pounds and guess what - Nothing happened.  I still weighed 350 pounds.  I think I said I weighed 205 pounds for a year or two before anything changed but it did.  I finally lost the weight. 

So where did I have to re-learn the lesson?  Well, at the end of June of this year, the Lord instructed me to stop listening to country music and to listen to only christian music for the entire month of July.  Before anyone gets mad, I am not saying that country music is garbage but it is not as uplifting as christian music.  As a matter of fact, I still like country music and I listen to it a little now but the Lord was preparing me for a couple of trials that he knew I would face in July.  Both were definitely learning experiences for me.  See I needed to be extra careful what I was feeding my brain so that when the time came, I would be strong enough to handle what I faced.

Let me sum it up like this.  Your brain is an organ in your body.  What you feed it will definitely effect how it works.  Now I am not talking about physical food although that is important.  I'm talking about thoughts and words.  What you listen to and say about yourself will absolutely make a difference in your life.  So pay attention to what you feed it!  You're worth far too much!

That's another Opinion of the Minion